Grow Up!
by i1i1wow
Summary: Phineas just won't mature. He is still as childish and oblivious as ever, and now that he is on the tail end of adolescence, he is going to have to pay in full for it. Ferb wants to be cool. One bad decision leads to another, and what was once a really bad crush turns into an entire war, albeit slowly. AU
1. The Balloon

"Ferb, I know what we're going to do today!" Phineas exclaimed.

They were all sixteen now.

"We can make a giant bouncy ball!" Ferb rolled his eyes.

Phineas was really getting too old for things like bouncy balls.

"I am sure the rest of the gang doesn't want to play with bouncy balls," Ferb stated.

"Wait! You actually used your daily line now? Okay, if it is really that big of a deal, then we could make a giant sock puppet!" Phineas exclaimed.

Ferb sighed and shook his head. "Okay, then, how about we make plush stuffed animals?" Phineas suggested.

Ferb just walked away.

Isabella was just coming through the gate.

"Hi, Phineas, what you doing? I mean, whatcha' doin'?" Isabella corrected.

"I'm just trying to find something to do today," Phineas replied.

"I know! We could make wading pools that auto-swivel!"

"Uh, okay?" Isabella hesitated.

"What's wrong?" Phineas asked.

"It is just that, well, aren't we a little too old to be walking through wading pools?" Isabella stated.

Phineas frowned and looked down at the ground.

"I guess," Phineas answered.

"Candace, what should I do today?" Phineas asked.

"Nothing! I am going on a picnic with Jeremy, so don't build anything! You hear me? Don't build anything!" she yelled.

Phineas shed a single tear.

Then he shook his head violently.

Now was not a time to cry, it was the first day of summer, after all.

Then he sat on the stairs.

Then he let his tears flow freely.

Everyone said he was too old for this and too old for that.

It broke his heart.

Little did he know, Candace felt the same way about Ducky Momo.

"Where's Perry?" Phineas muttered.

"Oh, he is right here, where he always is these days, Phineas," Linda responded.

Perry's health went downhill, so he no longer worked for the agency.

The shriveled brick rolled over in his platybed.

Phineas gently scooped Perry up and held him in his lap.

Perry understood Phineas, even if Phineas felt no one else did.

Then Phineas broke into tears once more.

"I don't know what to do, Perry," he shuddered.

"No one likes my ideas. Isabella seems more distant than ever. I am starting to really worry about our friendship. What if she stops coming over? What if I never see her again?" Phineas worried.

Perry just made his noise in response.

It was as if Perry had just given a Ferb speech.

No matter what happened, Perry would always be the fun, lady platypus that he and Ferb had both grown to love, Phineas thought.

Phineas embraced Perry tightly.

"Nothing says mother's love like a good ol' platypus butt," Phineas remarked.

That was a deja vu moment for him.

Then he rested Perry back in his bed.

He stood up.

Then he went out and made a giant balloon.

It was a smiley face with a yellow head and black features.

He needed a quarter-ton anvil to keep it from floating away.

He was glad that he had pre-tied it.

"Oh, there you are, Phin-" Isabella started. "What is that?"

Ferb appeared.

Then Buford and Baljeet arrived.

"Ha! Ha! Look at that stupid looking balloon! 'Jeet, scissors!" Buford bellowed.

"Yes, Buford," Baljeet sighed.

Baljeet handed Buford a pair of scissors.

Buford ran towards the string that the balloon was tied to.

"No!" Phineas thought.

He tried to scream it, but no sound came out.

His larynx was locked up.

Buford cut the string and the giant balloon floated away.

Then he cackled mischievously.

He didn't realize how much he had hurt the poor boy, however.

Ferb, Isabella, and Baljeet just blinked.

"What do you have to say to that, you big fat baby?" Buford asked.

Now he was just being mean.

Ferb, Isabella, and Baljeet all could have said something.

But they didn't.

"Hit me with your best shot, pacifier man," Buford dared.

Phineas turned and ran away.

He was on the verge of tears. Ferb, Isabella, and Baljeet did nothing.

They just didn't respect Phineas anymore.

They thought that he needed to grow up.

The Isabella from three months ago would have stood up for him.

But now when she thought of Phineas, she thought of how much he had broken her heart.

It was her own fault, really.

If she had told him how she felt about him, he would have felt the same way.

But now she told herself that she didn't have a crush on Phineas anymore, that it had faded.

She could believe it as long as she wasn't staring into his eyes.

Now that she thought about it, she wondered why she even came to his house anymore.

"Just for the rest of the summer," she promised herself. "Just for the rest of the summer."

Meanwhile, Phineas was sobbing alone in his room with his head buried in his pillow.

He felt so betrayed.

He was a victim of a society that said you had to "Grow Up!"

His brother, Ferb, refused to stand up for him, the uncool kid.

His neighbor and best friend, Isabella, refused to stand up for him, the uncool kid.

Baljeet, being bullied often himself, had developed a callous, so it wouldn't have seemed logical to him to stand up for Phineas, the uncool kid.

Buford bullied Phineas.

His only comfort was Perry.

He fell asleep embracing the platypus.

 **I don't usually write from experience, but I did when writing this. I remember I was bullied in kindergarten. It taught me what suffering was like. It taught me how to make my top vulnerability lower. It didn't make me any harder on the outside, it just made me learn to accept putdowns and move on with life. I was somewhat like Phineas then in character... But I'm not anymore. Please review!**


	2. Tail End Of The Platypus

Phineas awoke.

Bright sunshine came through the window.

It was morning.

Then he realized something.

The body next to him was cold.

"Perry! No! No! Perry!" he cried.

The dead platypus gave no response.

He cried out.

Linda rushed over to the room.

When she saw the dead platypus in her son's arms, she gasped.

"Phineas, come with me," Linda instructed. "And bring Perry."

Phineas did as he was told like a robot.

Linda grabbed two shovels and led Phineas out to the backyard.

Phineas was the only one who still loved Perry when Perry died.

He was in tears.

When Ferb saw Perry, he quickly turned around and walked the other way.

Phineas was in despair; he was seeing the tail end of the platypus.

Isabella walked up just as they were finishing.

"What happened?" Isabella asked.

"Perry died today. We all knew it was going to happen..."

...except for Phineas.

That was what Linda didn't say.

Phineas was too grieved to speak.

"Oh," Isabella responded.

"So, no invention?" she asked Phineas.

He just ran up to her and embraced her.

His tears got all over her shoulder.

Usually she would love this, but she didn't really like Phineas anymore.

Any good feeling that came from being with Phineas was crushed by the knowledge that he would never be anything more than a friend.

"Just for the rest of the summer," she told herself. "Just for the rest of the summer, then I will happily cut my ties with him."

She didn't know why part of her still liked Phineas.

It was dying, but for the moment being, it was still there.

It was too weak to stand up to Buford, but it wasn't dead yet.

"What if we made a giant pillow?" Phineas bursted randomly.

"Grow up!" Isabella exclaimed.

Phineas seemed taken aback and hurt.

Not that Isabella really cared.

She just walked out the gate.

"Isabella, wait!" Phineas exclaimed.

"Why do you even try?" Isabella asked.

"Because, because, because I want to spend time with you guys," Phineas explained.

Isabella thought the last word was completely unnecessary.

She scoffed.

He called her again.

"Isabella!" he beckoned.

"Why? Why do you even bother? What do your inventions even accomplish? Nothing! That's what!" she bellowed.

"Isabella, wait!" Phineas screamed.

"For what? A recreation of the world's largest diaper?" she retorted.

"Please!" he cried quietly.

"No, Phineas, I am sick of your childlike attitude! You are such a baby!" Isabella condemned.

He was crying heavily now.

"Well, you're, you're, you're not important anyway!" he countered haphazardly.

That hurt Isabella so much.

She ran away crying.

This only made Phineas' anguish increase tenfold.

He ran into his room.

He buried his face in his pillow, but this time it didn't work.

He shouldn't have said that.

He really shouldn't have said that.

His wailing was loud and obnoxious.

His whining was deafening.

He really was a baby sometimes, and no one accepted that anymore, except for Perry.

And Perry was buried in the backyard.

No one loved Phineas Flynn, Phineas thought.

At least him parents didn't hate him.

Candace hated him, she always had, Ferb didn't like him anymore, he pushed Isabella away, and he was only just beginning to realize just how much he cared about her, Buford hated him, Baljeet was with Buford, so there was really no one who loved him.

He here had found a tireless grief, one that would never go away until he knew someone loved him.

So he wailed on.

Then the sun had set.

The next morning Isabella came over to Phineas' house.

She would not have, but her mother would have known something was wrong if she hadn't.

"Hi, Phineas," Isabella greeted dully.

"I'm sorry, Isabella; I didn't mean what I said. You are very important to me!"

Isabella's inner pain wained slightly.

She had grown distant from Phineas, and she hated it, but her cup that was once half empty and half full was almost empty now.

She was almost fully and emptily numb.

But she could still feel a little, and she wanted that.

She want him more than everything and... oop, she just let her feelings come out.

Go back into the deserted hole where you live, emotional Isabella.

She took a deep breath.

She almost told him that she was not going to come over anymore, but her will was weaker than ever, and she didn't have it in her.

She learned to take the path of least resistance.

That was and is a bad policy.

Truth be told, if she just walked up to Phineas and kissed him passionately, her troubles would be over.

But she didn't think it was that easy.

If she looked at things differently, she would be able to enjoy her everyday life.

But she never released her hurt, and it was never quelled.

"Isabella, am I important to you?" Phineas asked.

"Yes," she blurted. If she had given it any thought, she would have lied to him.

"Then, I want to strengthen our relationship however I can. You're my best friend. I..." Phineas started.

He almost blurted two more words.

"...really care about you. It is like, I dunno, I just feel so much better when you're near. Please, don't leave this relationship behind."

Isabella was shocked.

What he said could be interpreted as that he wanted to be Isabella's boyfriend because he was in love with her.

Isabella felt that the second might be true.

A spark of hope flew through her eyes.

Then she reminded herself how childish Phineas was.

Why did she have to fall in love with Phineas?

Why not Ferb, or Baljeet, or even Buford?

What did Phineas have that the others didn't?

Then Isabella remembered.

It was the glint in his eyes, the way he beamed every day, except as of late.

He was such a mixed bag to her.

On one hand, he was handsome, handy, and had a vigorous personality.

On the other hand, he was extremely childish and thick as a brick when it came to realizing unsaid things, like crushes.

Her heart rate got a boost.

Phineas was hugging her.

Why did Phineas always disturb her stomach, making it all jittery, like butterflies?

There's a funny backstory to that one.

She sighed.

Now she was reminded that Phineas probably wouldn't ever be her girlfriend.

She imagined her and Phineas in their old age, with Phineas still not getting how Isabella felt about him.

The idea stuck in her mind like a thorn in her side.

That was her ultimate fear.

It was even worse to her than if Phineas rejected her.

Actually, she didn't care about rejection as much as she used to, but her will also got weaker by the same quantity.

That was why she was giving Phineas this one last summer.

If he didn't grow up, she would move on.

Then Isabella noticed how close their lips were.

Isabella leaned in as much as her weak will would allow.

Phineas leaned backwards by the same quantity.

His blush complimented his overall appearance.

"Whoa, I'm sorry!" Phineas apologized, as if he was the one who tried to close the distance.

She knew he was feeling something new, but that he was confused more than anything.

So she embraced him.

He became immovable, like a statue.

Phineas suddenly showed confusion and a certain kind of squirmishness, that meant he felt that his personal bubble had burst.

Isabella backed away as soon as he started squirming.

Then Phineas had a sudden urge to hug her.

He scolded himself and tried to dismiss it.

It would not go away.

And so Romantic Phineas was reborn.

He was no longer just the small part of Phineas that tried to go against reason.

This would cause problems for Phineas in the future.

But for now, Phineas was still his old, oblivious, childish self.

Isabella looked very hurt.

Then Phineas went to hug her.

He felt really nervous.

Not a good kind of nervous; he was feeling a bad kind of nervous.

"I'm sorry," Phineas apologized.

"It is okay," Isabella responded duly.

"You want to build something?" Phineas asked.

"Not if it's your idea!" Isabella struck.

"Ok, then. What would you want to build?" Phineas asked with a frown on his face.

Isabella didn't answer.

She just went out the door before Phineas could say a word.

"Just for the rest of the summer," she promised herself.

But everyone knows that promises that are repeated in nervousness are not going to be kept.

Isabella had a will to leave Phineas now, however, and that will was drawing a line.

If Phineas did not realize his love for her by the end of the summer, Isabella would cut her ties, she said to herself.

She didn't even recall that Perry had died.

Such is the heartbreaking nonchalance of this restraining culture.

 **I don't know what my comment would be for this chapter. I think I will just write on!**


	3. Hunger

Phineas facepalmed.

Why did he just make Isabella leave?

Tears threatened to come.

So Phineas reluctantly and haphazardly consulted Ferb.

"Ferb, I need to talk to you," Phineas stated.

Then Ferb facepalmed, as if Phineas just said something stupid.

"Why didn't you stand up to Buford when he destroyed my work?!" Phineas charged.

Ferb's jaw posture turned rigid.

"Because he was in the right," Ferb countered.

"Do you believe that to be true?!" Phineas interrogated.

Ferb nodded his head menacingly.

"That is a lie built upon a fallacy!" Phineas convicted.

"Go away!" Ferb swept.

"Not until you tell me the truth, the whole truth, and nothing but the truth!" Phineas riled.

Ferb stared him down.

They were having a staredown.

Ferb blinked first.

"Why?" Phineas spurted. "Why?! I needed you, and you refused to stand up for your brother. You won't even tell me why! Why?"

"Because you need to grow up," Ferb answered.

"Grow up?! Grow up?!" Phineas asked.

Now he was literally giggling sideways in extreme frustration, retaliation, and impatience.

"You think I need to grow up? Go get some fertilizer so you can grow a head! What makes me more immature than the lot of you? And why is me being immature a good excuse for you to do that?"

"Because it's fun," Ferb stated simply.

Phineas was now fully riled.

"YOU TRAITOR! YOU WOULDN'T HELP ME IF IT WAS MY LIFE!" Phineas blasted.

Ferb staggered backwards.

He clung to the banister for support.

"Our- relationship- is- over," Ferb struggled to state.

Then he hobbled up the stairs and left Phineas to cry alone.

Phineas had a hunger for friendship that was always fed, but now everyone had changed.

He remembered when Isabella would put her nose in his hair and smell it.

He remembered when Ferb would give him a thumbs up.

He remembered when Buford playfully teased him by calling him "Dinner Bell".

Baljeet was forever under the power of Buford, it seemed.

Phineas refused to accept Baljeet's fate as his own.

"I don't know what I am going to do, Perry. My life is bad now. I just wish you would come back," Phineas lamented.

What was ironic was that Heinz was monologuing as if Perry was there too.

"So you think you can defeat me, Perry the Platypus? Well, you can't, because you got replaced by Peter the Panda, and you are no longer a secret agent, and you're gone now..." Heinz rambled.

Then he sighed and shed one solitary tear.

"I'm a failure," Heinz muttered.

That was the story of his life.

"I can't even live without a stupid monotreme who was my frenemy. Vanessa's off at O.W.C.A., Charlene never talks to me anymore, Norm broke down, and all I have left to do is watch television, fight Peter, and make muffins."

Heinz broke down on the couch.

He was talking to a platypus who wasn't even present, and hadn't been in a long time.

He stuffed another muffin in his mouth and howled in lament.

Meanwhile, Phineas was in a similar situation.

He gobbled up the sandwich his mother laid before him.

Hunger jumped around in Phineas.

Pretty soon, Phineas had shoved one twentieth of the food in the fridge down his piehole.

That included pie.

His mother stopped him.

"Phineas, what are you doing? Stop eating or you are going to hurl!" Linda cautioned.

Phineas frowned and burst into tears once more.

"What's wrong?" Linda asked.

He just turned around and ran into his room.

"Phineas?! Phineas!" Linda exclaimed.

She exhaled frustratedly and followed.

"Listen, Phineas, I am your mother. It is my job to know what is going on. And right now I don't. Why are you so upset? I have never seen you like this! I need you to tell me what's going on!"

"No! It, it, it hurts too much," Phineas cried.

"Are you doing drugs?!" Linda exclaimed.

"No!" Phineas exclaimed immediately.

"Were you doing it with Isabella?" Linda asked fearfully.

"What do you even mean?" Phineas asked back confusedly.

Linda took a step back.

Her son was sixteen, and he didn't even know what she meant.

Then she thought back and verbally gasped.

Linda thought Lawrence had told Phineas how it works.

But she must have assumed wrong.

She had really done it this time.

How was she supposed to tell him now?

Sure, it's awkward when he's twelve, but when he's sixteen?

She got back to the subject at hand.

"Why are you like this?" Linda asked.

She was wondering why she had even asked the Isabella question.

In retrospect, that didn't fit in with his behavior.

She just dismissed it as a mother's paranoia.

"Ferb, Isabella, Buford, they're all being mean to me in their own ways. They say that I should just grow up! Grow up! Ha! I'd like to see them grow another limb!" Phineas pouted angrily and sorrowfully.

Then the full waterworks came.

"They exclude me from everything!" Phineas screeched.

"I love them so much, but now they hate me! Don't you see! My life is ruined! And should I give a crud? No! But I do," Phineas wailed.

"Oh. I am so sorry, honey. I think that this is my and Lawrence's fault," she explained.

"You see, Ferb and the others know some things that I should have taught you a long time ago. Firstly, any activity that is done by toddlers is uncool, but if you call your girlfriend "baby", that's cool," Linda started.

For clarification, Linda didn't know a lot about being cool, but she still knew infinitely more than Phineas.

"What's a girlfriend?" Phineas asked in response.

 **Read the first sentence again for an extra laugh. This is a strange mix of comedy and tragedy. :-)-: Please review!**


	4. Linda Defines : Ferb Replies

Linda chuckled heartily, much to Phineas' dismay.

"Honey, a girlfriend is like someone who is anywhere between romantic partner and anticipating fiancee," Linda explained.

"Oh, that makes so much sense... What is a romantic partner?" Phineas asked.

"I don't know exactly how to define that, but I can give myself and Lawrence as examples of romantic partners, because he is my husband," Linda explained.

"So a romantic partner is basically a husband," Phineas concluded.

Linda faceplamed for the first time in her entire life.

It was all her subconscious, so she gasped.

"What?!" Phineas asked concernedly.

"Nothing, it is just that you got the definition wrong. All right; let me explain. Let's say you walk down the street and you see Isabella coming. Suddenly your heartbeat increases. You feel very jittery. That is a crush. You want nothing more than to kiss her! That's a really big crush; I just used Isabella as an example," Linda started.

Phineas' face turned wan, pallid, pale, colorless, before breaking out into dulled crimson, flush, florid, and ruddy in complexion.

Linda continued.

"Let's say you go after her."

Phineas' tension increased.

"You tell her how you feel and she feels the same way and voila, you and Isabella are in a romantic relationship," Linda explained.

"But then, you would probably want to become her boyfriend. So you would, and a few years would pass and then you would come to her with a diamond ring," Linda recalled.

Phineas couldn't take it anymore.

"I, um, uh, well, I need, ah," Phineas stalled.

"Why are you acting so nervous, silly! It almost seems like you do have a crush on Isabella. That would be a strange coincidence, wouldn't it, Phineas?" Linda asked.

Phineas just walked quietly out of the room.

"Wait, you do?" Linda asked in faux surprise.

She was a Phinabella shipper right down to the core.

Phineas ran in to his room.

Phineas fell over on his bed and idled.

He didn't want to have a crush on Isabella; romance was a very touchy subject for Phineas.

Even thinking about it applying to him seemed to violate some unwritten law.

He realized why Isabella's refusal to stand up for Phineas hurt more than the others.

He wanted more, so much more than just friendship.

And no, just because Phineas became somewhat romantically aware doesn't mean that he had "grown up" at all.

He was still childish in most respects, romantic situations and dealings included.

He still didn't understand what happened behind closed doors.

He still didn't understand how dates worked.

He was still almost utterly clueless.

All he knew was that he had no idea about anything anymore when it came to Isabella.

Ferb sprang into his mind.

Ferb was not his brother anymore.

He was just a boy who lived in the same house.

He felt pain equal to what he felt with Isabella.

Suddenly, Irving popped up.

"Hello, Phineas," Irving greeted.

"First off, who are you? Why are you in my room? And why do you have that corny grin on your face?" Phineas interrogated.

"Buford is going to get you, tomorrow!" Irving informed.

Irving cackled at the look on Phineas' face.

"Ta ta!" Irving shouted.

Then he threw a unprofessional sort of smoke bomb and disappeared.

Phineas went to look at his blueprints.

A few minutes later, Linda called him in for dinner.

Phineas sat down next to Ferb.

Ferb turned away excludingly.

Candace noticed it.

"Phineas and Ferb?! What did you two do this time?!" Candace yelled.

"Candace, volume!" Linda rebuked.

"Well, Phineas won't grow up!" Ferb struck in his cunning British accent.

The room grew silent.

"Ferb, that isn't really the most polite thing to say, it's it?" Lawrence chided.

"Explain!" Candace burst suddenly.

"Phineas won't stop asking for us to do childish things, like make giant smiley faces balloons or make bouncy balls or..." Ferb started.

"Hey! I sound the Ducky Momo sound loud and proud! You better not say something regrettable, mister," Candace threatened.

Ferb broke into laughter which was met by a bowl of hot soup thrown sideways on his lap.

"Candace Flynn!" Linda exclaimed.

"You should know proper table behavior," Linda pouted.

"Fat chance if Ferb dares to defile Ducky Momo," Candace countered.

"You know what? _ Ducky Momo!" Ferb yelled.

"Ferrb! I need to have a little chat with you," Lawrence foreshadowed.

He got up and beckoned for Ferb.

Ferb followed timidly.

And so Linda was there with her daughter and her son.

"Candace!" Linda exclaimed.

Candace just ignored her by reaching for another piece of bread.

It was clear to Linda that Candace would not apologize, so she just sighed in frustration and left the room.

Meanwhile, Lawrence took Ferb into the garage.

Ferb was feeling a great amount of dread.

"So son," Lawrence started. "What do you think about what happened?"

He was very stern and convicting in his temperament, but not wrathy or condemning.

"I think that Candace and Phineas are ridiculous. They think life is just a basket of cherries, do they? They need to grow up and realize that it isn't all poppies and pansies!" Ferb retorted.

"Do you think that your word choice was appropriate?" Lawrence asked.

"No, and that's why I said it that way," Ferb countered coldly.

"Well, you're brutally honest; I'll give you that," Lawrence commented.

"Why did you choose an inappropriate word choice?" Lawrence confronted.

"Because their worldviews are irrelevant and inadequate to the real world! They need to grow up!" Ferb exclaimed.

"No, son, you need to grow up. You think there is a big gap between childhood and adulthood? There is not! Let me tell you from experience, some people truly never grow up, like your Uncle Adrian. He is as big of a baby as he always has been. You just have to learn to live with these types of people, not that I agree that Candace and Phineas need to grow up more than they are, or that they are of those types. They are fine to me. Tell me, why are you so riled?" Lawrence prompted.

"It annoys me to death and embarrasses me, okay?" Ferb defended.

"Why are you embarrassed?" Lawrence asked.

"Because they're so childish and kiddy!" Ferb answered in frustration.

"Who are you in front of that makes you embarrassed? In other words, if Phineas and Candace were doing a 'childish' play, what are the people that you would never want in the audience?" Lawrence asked.

This question threw Ferb off kilter, which is quite an achievement, that is, to make Ferb lose his composure.

"I would not want Buford, Monty, or Vanessa there, especially that last one," Ferb answered honestly.

"Is that your crush?" Lawrence asked.

"Well, uh, um, yeah," Ferb muttered.

"Who is Monty?" Lawrence asked.

"Her current boyfriend," Ferb answered.

"Why would you not want Buford there?" Lawrence asked.

"Because, he's a jerk! Did you hear about how bad he bullied Phineas? It is humiliating! Phineas couldn't even stand up for himself! I mean, what am I supposed to do? Stand up for him because my wittle bwubah can't stand up for himself? That would be even worse! If Buford was there at the play, he would make some rotten joke, and everyone would laugh at the Phineas in a kitty suit and the Candace in a puppy suit! I am honestly fully sick of both of them! Do you realize how badly they could damage my reputation? You really don't get what this is all about, do you? If I get labelled as uncool, Vanessa will never even set her eyes on me! I can't let that happen! I just can't!" Ferb explained.

Tears were in his eyes; this was when Lawrence realized that it wasn't just a crush.

 **You hated Ferb, and now you love him... or you still hate him. Ferb isn't an awful person, he is just a slave to society. Whether you like doughnuts or not, I will write on! :-p Wow, that was random. (stomach rumbles) Or perhaps not... Review!**


	5. Overcast

"Oh," Lawrence commented.

"So this is all about that girl?" Lawrence asked.

"Yes," Ferb admitted.

"Who has a boyfriend?" Lawrence interrogated.

"Yes," Ferb answered coldly.

"What kind of a guy is he?" Lawrence asked.

"Tall, coolest kid in town, arrogant, moderately big nose, sort of like mine, but different," Ferb listed.

"Hmm," Lawrence interjected.

"He is the quarterback for our high school's football team," Ferb explained.

"He hates any guy who shows any sign of weakness, sort of like Buford, but worse," Ferb continued.

"What punishment do you want? You have to have some type, or Mom will have to punish you, and you won't get to choose," Lawrence explained.

"Five nights in the basement," Ferb suggested.

"Then it is decided," Lawrence closed.

The next day was overcast, but a lot of light still hit the Earth's surface.

Phineas only slept two hours because he couldn't very well sleep without Ferb in the room.

He got up and went outside.

Isabella was just walking up to the gate.

She went through.

"Hi, Phineas," Isabella greeted.

"Hi, Isabella," Phineas greeted back.

"What are you up to?" Isabella asked.

Phineas layed down on the grass.

Isabella was surprised.

She had never seen Phineas just a lay down in the grass, although she had seen him sit on the grass countless times.

"I only got two hours of sleep last night," Phineas explained.

"Oh," Isabella said uselessly.

"It has been a long time since I looked at the clouds," Phineas informed.

"Well, they're all across the sky today, aren't they?" Isabella asked.

"Yeah, but sometimes you can see little holes in the clouds, and it shines light on small places," Phineas explained.

Phineas scooched to his right in a beckoning way, his eyes never leaving the sky.

His smile was lighting Isabella up.

Forget whether he knew how she felt, that smile was golden.

She subconsciously layed down on the grass just far enough away so that when their elbows, not arms, were extended they did not touch.

Her conscious was too passive and nervous to have done what her subconscious had done.

"See that one? That one looks like it's shining right through Baljeet's window!" Phineas exclaimed.

"How would you know that it was shining through a window and not on Mrs. Tjinder's flowers?" Isabella challenged playfully.

"Just a guess," Phineas answered.

She giggled at this, which made him smile wider.

"Look over there," Isabella prompted.

"Whoa! That building in the sunlight looks just like Ferb's head. I wonder who built it," Phineas related.

"Maybe Reginald's father," Isabella suggested.

"No, Reginald's father never came to America, although his father did," Phineas explained.

"Cool! Do you know what he was doing in America?" Isabella asked.

"No," Phineas answered.

"Hmm," Isabella responded.

Suddenly, a beam of sunlight shot through the clouds and landed right where Phineas and Isabella were.

The looks on their faces were priceless.

The sun had singlebeamedly put Phineas and Isabella in a sort of limelight.

Florid could not describe their flushing faces.

Now was when Buford came carrying a bruised and beaten Baljeet.

Baljeet had two black eyes and looked barely conscious.

Buford came in calmly, as if there wasn't a living punching bag slung over his shoulder.

When he saw Phineas and Isabella in the limelight, he cracked up.

His laughing was so destructive.

"What are you laughing at?!" Isabella countered.

"Dinner Bell and Girly sitting in a..."

Isabella knocked him over with a swift kick.

Buford made no sound but a thud.

He got up immediately.

There was five seconds of dead silence.

"Now I don't usually hit girls, but I could make an exception, Sassabella!" Buford threatened.

Phineas had had enough. He charged headfirst into Buford's gut.

The fence behind Buford got plowed through.

Just as the fence broke, Buford grabbed Phineas' torso and threw him like a football.

A resounding thud was heard as Phineas' head hit the tree.

"Phineas!" Isabella cried.

Buford cackled and left.

Phineas was in utter agony.

Isabella realized that blood was dripping from his already red hair.

"Linda!" Isabella screamed.

"Yes?!" Linda responded.

"Phineas needs to be taken to the hospital," Isabella explained. "Get me a washcloth!"

 **By the way, Monty and Vanessa are younger in this story than in the show. It is an AU, after all. Don't worry, Phineas' brain is not damaged, but something else might be. Muwahahaha. I wrote from the experience of hitting my head so hard, it was bloody, and from the experience of being bullied. I have never been thrown like a football, however, although I was like a misguided missile when I had my latest head accident. I'd probably be a super genius if I had never hit my head on anything. Also, there are a couple antagonists I haven't unsheathed yet. Sorry, Glendida fans, but that OC is not to be featured in this story. Wait, I don't think any of you are Glendida fans. All the better... Please review!**


	6. Monogram Entry Journal 1

Major Francis Monogram Personal Journal

Entry 1

Monty has been on me all year, about how it isn't cool to sing opera. He really doesn't seem to get how important it is to me. I blame society for what my son is now, because wherever the snotty attitude came from, it did not come from me or his mother. He should look up to Carl, but instead he acts like the aspiring intern is an old, dirty, unusable rag that fell on his shoulder. He should want to visit his aunt and uncle, but when we told him he couldn't bring his phone he flipped out. I have seen him being very mean to some other kids. I mourn for my son. He did not choose the right path.

. . .

Phineas awoke from his slumber.

He was in a hospital bed.

"Oh, so you are awake?" Linda asked Phineas.

"Yes," Phineas responded.

"The doctors gave you thirteen stitches," Linda explained.

"Also, Isabella didn't tell me how you got hurt. Care to explain?" Linda asked.

"Buford and I got in a fight," Phineas admitted.

"Over what?" Linda inquired.

"He threatened Isabella," Phineas responded.

"Oh!" Linda exclaimed. "That thug!"

"When do I get to leave this hospital bed?" Phineas asked.

"Whenever you are ready," Linda answered.

And so they left.

. . .

When Phineas arrived back home, he went in and sat down. He heard Ferb even from the other room.

"Wait, are you telling me that Phineas Flynn, the most childish boy in the universe, got into a fight and actually grazed the other guy? I don't believe it. I just don't. Phineas couldn't hurt a mouse if it bit him in his-" Ferb started.

"Now, now, Ferb," Lawrence chided.

"That boy needs to man up! If he actually got in a fight, and the other guy didn't come out unscathed, he would actually be slightly manly, and I would eat my hat!" Ferb ranted.

"There are edible Mexican hats, the ones made out of tortilla chip and with salsa or beans or something in the rim of the hat," Candace interjected.

"It's a figure of speech, you Children's Encyclopedia!" Ferb countered.

"Hey! Those hats happen to taste really good!" Candace bellowed.

"Whoa! We're blowing it out of proportion! Calm down," Linda instructed. Ferb just left. Lawrence sighed and cleared his throat.

"I'm sorry, Candace, but Ferb has explained to me that he has ulterior motives. Just try not to take it too personally; he is going through a rough time," Lawrence explained. Candace gave a miniscule nod. She still didn't look convinced. Meanwhile, Phineas was thinking, with his palms on his temples.

"Why does Ferb think so little of me?" Phineas asked himself. "I remember when he wasn't like this. Those were the days; now Ferb is so stressed, I wonder if he even sleeps at night. Why do I have a sudden urge to- to pray for him? What good would that do? It doesn't help that I can neither prove nor disprove God's existence. He's just there, in the back of my mind, like he wants me to do something- Focus, Phineas. Christianity isn't considered cool anyways," he told himself. "Why does everyone think you have to be cool? Why can't you be cute like Isabella or scholarly like Baljeet? Apparently Buford is a stereotypical 'cool' kid. And I wish he never walked the earth. I am no longer childish, I am flat out anti-cool. And Ferb hates it. Why does he care whether I'm cool or not? He can't just end his friendship with me; we're stepbrothers. That 'ship' has already sailed. I hope he doesn't have anything important invested in this 'cool' business. Because he isn't very easily going to keep it," Phineas thought.

. . .

Ferb straightened his shirt. He thought back to Candace's hat comment from yesterday. It still annoyed him. It was completely benign, unless it was locked in a room with someone's reputation. If he wanted to rise to the top, he knew he needed to consult Buford, whether he liked it or not. Buford was a geek on cool, except he didn't talk about it like a geek, because it was a paradox, an oxymoron. You couldn't be a geek and a cool kid at the same time. He had knocked on the door thirty seconds ago. Ferb's black sunglasses complimented his overall appearance. Buford opened the door.

"Hey, man. I was wondering if you could help me with a goal of mine," Ferb explained.

"What is it?" Buford asked.

"I want to rise to the top of the charts. I want what Monty Monogram has," Ferb explained.

Buford looked visibly surprised.

"You know once you get there, you will eventually have to leave, and no one ever wants to leave. As a friend, I advise that you forget it," Buford advised. Buford might have been extremely mean to Phineas, but he was Ferb's friend, because Ferb was cool. It wouldn't ruin Buford's reputation to be nice to Ferb. But Buford felt that if he had done any less to Phineas than he did, it would have been very bad for his reputation. Even he was a slave to society. Society had a couple core people, the penultimate antagonists, the crafty vines that were only known to the "privileged". Power was all that they cared about. You had to be an insider to even know their names.

"No! I don't think you understand how much I want this!" Ferb yelled.

"All right! All right! Let me hook you up with my man, Hans," Buford offered. Buford offered the common sense that Ferb needed, but Ferb would not listen. Buford saw that. So he hesitated no more. "He knows a guy who knows a guy who knows how to get you exactly how to get you Monty's position, literally," Buford explained. Ferb stood wide eyed towards Buford.

"It is really that easy?" Ferb asked himself. Of course it wasn't, because you had to know the right people, but Ferb did. "Wow, great!" Ferb uttered ecstatically.

"Here is his number," Buford beckoned. On a strip of paper lied a ten digit number in this format: (***) - *** - ****

"Thanks," Ferb thanked. He ran out. He knew his next move.

 **I'm sorry that this took so long to write. I have just had a lot more to do, like writing my book. I am glad to have finally finished this chapter. By the way, I am planning on starting the next chapter on the same day Ferb is talking to Buford, but in Phineas' Point Of View. Poor Baljeet! I think he will play a bigger role later on. Inspiration for this chapter was from a song, Viva La Vida, by Coldplay, which needless to say, I do not own. I guess that is kind of like saying "I am not a cow from the moon!" XD If you thought I was a cow from the moon, be sure to PM me. If not, be sure to review! If you thought I just might be a cow from the moon, then I don't know what to say. 8-P**


	7. Patience

**By the way, this story is an AU, so if you think the characters are OOC, they were made to be. If you are worried about whether this story will have a happy ending or not, don't worry, it will end well. But bumpy the road will be. The biggest difference in character when comparing the show to this story is the character flaws. This story is chalk full of flaws. Flaws to be mended...**

Phineas stirred. He got up, brushed his teeth, and went outside to wait for Isabella. He was still oblivious to how much he really loved her. Linda actually went out to talk to Phineas. "How are you doing, hon?" Linda asked.

"I am just waiting for Isabella to come over," Phineas responded.

"Aw! You two are so cute together!" Linda remarked.

"What do you mean?" Phineas asked in confusion.

"Nothing!" Linda defended. Phineas felt strange new appetites bubble up inside of him. Isabella wasn't even there, and it was happening. He wanted something he couldn't define, it was just there. Isabella was the relief, he knew that much. A chill ran down his spine. He felt very clueless and a little nervous. What was this flippable tortilla that now seemed to reside in his stomach? He visibly cringed. "What are you guys going to be doing?" Linda asked.

"Probably just hang out, because apparently no one likes my inventions anymore," Phineas explained.

"Aw, sweety, I love your inventions!" Linda encouraged. Of course, she thought they were pretend.

"That's 'cause you're my mom," Phineas responded. Linda frowned and got up to do some chores around the house. Phineas continued to wait. "Isabella is coming, right? She has to... Oh no, I think I have one of those thingies for Isabella. This is great; just great," Phineas thought. He sat distraught and fiddled with a blade of grass impatiently. It broke in two. Then he tried to piece it back together. It didn't work. Then he put the pieces adjacent to each other so that it would look like it was fixed.

"Phineas?" Isabella called.

"Yes?" Phineas responded.

"Whatcha' doin'?" she asked.

"What do you want to do?" Phineas asked back.

"I don't know, maybe we could do what we were doing before Buford interrupted us," Isabella suggested flirtatiously.

"Of course!" Phineas agreed. It was cloudy that day, but not overcast. "Look at that cloud!" Phineas pointed. They were both laying down in the grass with a small distance between them just like before.

"It looks like a baby," Isabella hinted.

"Yeah, a baby," Phineas responded in a knowing tone, even though he was technically still oblivious. Isabella was almost visibly shocked. This was that strike one she had been waiting for all of her life. Two more strikes, and it was an unsealed envelope; she would tell Phineas everything. But she had to make sure.

"That one looks like a crib," Isabella remarked.

"Mhm," Phineas responded with a lack of interest. She was sure of it now. She, in her excitement, counted it as strike two.

"What about that one? What do you see?" Isabella asked. A stork-like bird happened to pass by at just the wrong time.

"I see a stork," Phineas answered.

Isabella refrained from facepalming, but barely. He had gotten her hopes up so high, too. Patience was what she needed, but she had been waiting all her life. "Just for the rest of the summer," Isabella promised herself. She just wanted to cry. Storks?! Really, Phineas? "You know just how to suck the life out of any heart, don't you, Romeo," Isabella thought disdainfully.

"Are you okay? Did I say something wrong?" Phineas asked fearfully. If Isabella had had time to conjure a response, it wouldn't have been very good. But her immediate response was an apology.

"No, of course not!" Isabella responded. "It's fine." Phineas immediately visibly relaxed. His ribcage rested once more.

"Look at that one!" Phineas exclaimed.

"It looks like- I have no idea," Isabella informed.

"-maybe two guys pitted against each other," Phineas guessed.

"Those are some pretty blobby guys, then," Isabella remarked. They both burst into laughter.

"We're running out of clouds!" Phineas joked. This earned some more laughter.

"Which one is your favorite?" Isabella asked.

"The baby," Phineas responded. He said so because that was the one Isabella seemed to like most. Isabella flushed red. That was strike three, and all three happened in less than thirty minutes. But something was holding her back. In her language, he just told her something she was all too pleased to hear, but there was one problem: Phineas didn't speak Isabella's language, he spoke his own English. Still, she couldn't help but doubt this. She couldn't help but doubt that they were not meant to be. She could not help but doubt that they had different destinies. But these things she doubted were previously accepted supposed facts. "Patience, Isabella. Just for the rest of the summer," she promised herself once more. "After that, if Phineas doesn't ask me out, or something equivelant, I will stop going across the street every morning." Of course, this monologue was all inside her head.

"That was my favorite one too," she responded.

"Do you see that little cloud way far away?" Phineas motioned.

"I think so. Barely," Isabella reported.

"What does it remind you of?" Phineas asked.

"I don't want to talk about it," Isabella pushed.

"You know, you can talk to me about absolutely anything," Phineas consoled.

"Phineas, I said I don't want to talk about it," Isabella defended.

"That's okay, but could you at least tell me what I could do to make you feel better about it?" Phineas asked. That was not something Isabella was prepared to answer. So Isabella just shook her head rather violently, and surprisingly started tearing up. These weren't super emotional tears, but they were rather from anxiety than anything else. "Why can't I help you feel better?" Phineas pleaded.

"Because you would refuse," Isabella answered.

"No, I wouldn't," Phineas denied.

"No, you would never want it. You have some other destiny..." Isabella started.

"This is about my destiny? Why are you so unsettled by my destiny? Why do you care so much about my destiny? I don't know what my destiny is, but I know that it will be good enough, so why are you so interested in my destiny?" Phineas asked filled with curiosity.

"I think I got it, but just in case, I wasn't listening, so tell me again," Isabella dodged.

"Why do you care so much about my destiny?" Phineas asked.

"You would never understand," Isabella responded.

"Why wouldn't I?" Phineas challenged.

"Because you're oblivious," Isabella countered.

"You could just tell me," Phineas prodded.

"It isn't my place," Isabella explained.

"Then whose place is it?" Phineas asked. "You're the one who cares about my destiny, but not to explain?" Isabella started blushing really, really intensely.

"You know what? I don't care anymore! I have been sitting here for years waiting for you to understand!" Isabella burst.

"How do I know something I have never been told?" Phineas interjected. "Maybe instead of waiting for me to magically figure it out, you should have just told me. You think you are waiting for me, but you are really waiting for yourself. Are you ready now?"

"No," Isabella answered meekly. "In fact, I need you to find out yourself. You have until the end of summer." That line shut Phineas up pretty well.

"Any hints?" Phineas pleaded.

"Not a chance," Isabella responded. "I have already said too much." Phineas already looked distraught, which was not good news for him. A new threat looked over his head, one more frightening than any he had ever faced before. He could lose Isabella forever.

 **Now Phineas knows, but he doesn't. What a unique turn of events. I am incredibly satisfied with this chapter. (takes bite of wonderful hoagie) Mmm! Don't tell Buford! 8-p**


	8. Why Is Hidden

Phineas woke up to a new day. He had to find out why Isabella cared about his destiny and act on it in the way that would make Isabella the most happy. "Ferb? Why does Isabella care about my destiny?" Phineas asked.

"Because you are her age," Ferb hinted.

"So are you!" Phineas responded.

"That isn't the point, you child!" Ferb bellowed. He left in a rage.

"I suppose you consider being mean cool," Phienas countered. Ferb was too far away to hear or respond, though. Phineas broke down into tears. He had lost Ferb and was frighteningly close to losing Isabella, too. After that, his best friend was Candace, and then his mom. But for some reason his relationship with Isabella seemed different than all of the others. He ran his head through the facts over and over again, but the why was hidden. Why did Isabella care about his destiny? He sat on his bed and informally meditated. Why did she care about not about just his future, but what his specific future was? He could feel the knobs moving around in his head. He became self conscious of his breathing and started breathing more unevenly. He started breathing deeply and quickly. His head started feeling really weird. He felt tingly, and he had to stop. &€©·^$€ $#€ \/\/·%7$ 2 &€ · ¶·®7 •÷ |7 Phineas got up. He thought he heard something. He thought he just had the answer. He thought once more. Now it was clear. "Because she wants to be a part of it," Phineas thought. "Why is hidden, but I have the answer!" Just then Isabella was crossing the street. Phineas opened the screen door just as Isabella walked through the gate. "Isabella, I know the answer to why you care about my destiny!" Phineas exclaimed.

"Why?" Isabella asked.

"Because you want to be a part of it," Phineas said appreciatively.

"You are going to have to be more specific than that," Isabella countered with ease. It was in these days that Phineas would show the true size of his obliviousness. Phineas forgot to close his mouth. It hung open like a frail cave.

"You didn't say that," Phineas prodded.

"It was a given," Isabella responded. "Just be glad you have a clue."

Phineas frowned and embraced her tightly. "I don't want to lose you, Isabella. Please, if I don't figure it out, would you still come over?"

"No!" Isabella denied. "I can't live with an ignorant Phineas much longer!"

"But you won't tell me," Phineas confronted. "I'm thinking of a word. I want you to figure it out in ten minutes, but I'm not going to tell you unless you guess it. No hints!"

"Hey! That isn't a fair juxtaposition!" Isabella retaliated.

Phineas looked at her with anxious eyes. "Isabella, this is really, really hard," Phineas pleaded. "I can't handle this! All I want to do is spend my summer with you, but I can't lose you! I can't!"

"Deal with it," Isabella responded. She was very bitter. The Fireside Girls were to blame. Isabella wasn't their leader anymore; Gretchen was.

"You know what confuses me?" Phineas started.

"What?" Isabella responded.

"You aren't acting like you want to be part of my destiny at all. Care to explain?" Phineas confronted.

"I only want to be a part of your destiny if you can find out why I want to be a part of your destiny by yourself," Isabella blurted.

"Wait! Say that again," Phineas prompted.

"I only want to be a part of your destiny if you can find out why I want to be a part of your destiny by yourself," Isabella repeated.

"I know why you want to be part of my destiny! You want me to find out why, and I just did. You want to find out why, and I found out that you wanted me to find out about finding out!" Phineas exclaimed.

"You're overthinking this!" Isabella warned.

"I needed to find out that I needed to find out, and I just did," Phineas rejoiced.

"What you need to find out is how to find out what you need to find out, which would be finding out about not just finding out, but finding out about something, and that something is not finding out specifically about finding out, but it is finding out about finding out that x is true, and x is not finding out!" Isabella explained.

"Oh," Phineas surrendered. "You said some version of "find out" eleven times in one sentence. I am a little confused."

"You need to find out about a certain something besides finding out," Isabella simplified. "There. Is two better than eleven?"

Phineas nodded his head. "So, you want me to find out why you want to be a part of my destiny, or you don't want to be part of my destiny, but that isn't all of it."

"Exactly," Isabella confirmed.

"Oh," Phineas surrendered. "What do you want to do?"

"Look at the clouds, again," Isabella suggested sarcastically.

"Okay, we can do that," Phineas supported, unaware of her sarcasm. But now Isabella wanted to, just because she was spending time with Phineas. So they layed down in the grass with their elbows touching. It wasn't overcast, but there were a significant amount of clouds in the sky.

"What do you think of that cloud?" Isabella wondered.

"I think it looks like a scar," Phineas responded.

"What about that one?" Isabella beckoned.

"A cracked egg?" Phineas suggested.

"No, not that one; that one," Isabella redirected.

"A broken heart, like in those cartoons," Phineas responded. This answer was like a blow to the chest for Isabella. That is where Phineas learned what a broken heart looks like? A cartoon? No wonder he was such a joke.

"That is what a broken heart reminds you of?!" Isabella fumed.

"Yeah, of course. It isn't like you would find a broken heart under any other context, right?" Phineas answered, completely unaware that he was hurting Isabella's feelings.

Isabella got up and stormed off, much to Phineas' confusion.

 **This is my favorite chapter yet. Phineas is truly oblivious. He knows every non-romantic part of Isabella's headache, in an effort to make her feel better and to save their friendship, but he doesn't know the simple fact that Isabella has a broken heart. Review whether you want Phineas to meet the deadline of the end of summer or not. It is going to be close, that is for sure. :-þ**


	9. Call Frenzy - Revised

"Hello, is this Hans?" Ferb inquired.

"Yes," Hans replied.

"I am Buford's friend, Ferb. Nice to meet you," Ferb greeted.

"Nice to meet you too," Hans greeted. "What do you need?"

"I want to have what Monty has. I want to replace the snake," Ferb explained.

"Excellent! Monty has been at the top for too long," Hans stated. "Here, let me hook you up with Froyo."

"Froyo? That's his name?" Ferb inquired.

"Whatever you do, don't call him anything else, except homey," Hans advised. "Here, his phone number is:- do you have a pen and paper?"

"Mhm," Ferb confirmed.

"Oh, it is: (***) - *** - ****," Hans informed. "Talk to me if he gives you any grief."

"Will do," Ferb accepted.

"Goodbye, and good luck!" Hans finished.

"Bye," Ferb responded. Hans hung up. Ferb punched in the number.

"Hello, Froyo on da' phone," Froyo greeted.

"Hey, Froyo! I'm Hans' homey, Ferb," Ferb uttered flawlessly in a southern accent.

"Hey, homey! What you callin' for?" Froyo inquired.

"Act'ly I's wonderin' if I cou' git Monty Mon'gram canned, and have your homey, that's me, Ferb, to replace that old hag," Ferb proposed.

"Oh! You called the Cheese a hag! Dat's bold, man! Let's get on dat right now!" Froyo exclaimed in compliment. "Let me hook ya' up wit my gal, Dana, she's hot. Here, da' phone numba' is, you got ya' tab and chalk, righ'?"

"Yuhp," Ferb responded.

"Da' numba' is (***) - *** - ****, but don't call'er 'less it's between leven turdy and twelb turdy," Froyo advised. "Dat means, ya' gotta call her tomorra' er sometime after dat."

"K, thanks, Froyo," Ferb thanked.

"No probs," Froyo responded. "Bye, homey!"

Then Froyo hung up.

Ferb sighed. He was two small steps closer to his goal.

· · ·

Ferb woke up to a new day. The day before was the day Isabella said that "finding out" sentence. That was also the day of Ferb's call frenzy's beginning. He just had to wait until noon. He bumped into Candace in the hallway. She screamed in her startled state and dropped Ducky Momo. Ferb took the plush duck and ran to pierce it so Candace would be ridded of Ducky Momo forever.

"Ferb! Give me that back right now, or you are gonna pay, mister!" Candace bellowed. Ferb ran into the living room. There it was, the lance that hung above the television screen. Ferb sped toward it, holding up Ducky Mono like a sacrifice. "No! Ducky Momo!" Candace screamed. She tackled him down on the carpet, pinched his arm in just the right place, grabbed Ducky Momo, and started beating him over the head with it. Ferb laughed like Darth Sidious. Candace realized how futile her jabs were, so she fled with Ducky Mono in her arms.

"I will burn that thing!" Ferb threatened.

"You wouldn't dare," Candace countered.

"I would!" Ferb attacked. She had gone up into her room and was out of earshot now. Ferb went outside to clear his head. He bumped into Phineas on accident. "Hey! Watch it!" Ferb bellowed extremely loudly. Phineas cowered in the face of Ferb. He was still waiting for Isabella to come over. "Look, kid. You have to be presentable! That means you don't cower in the corner, you either quip, threaten, or ignore. If they get fed up and want to brawl, you got to give it to them! I can't have a wimpy brother ruin my reputation. So try me! Come on! Punch me as hard as you can! You better! You want me to rough you up? Huh? Come at me with all you have! Don't make me do it to you! You want it! You want it! Come and get it!" Ferb bellowed.

"I don't want to punch you," Phineas responded.

"Come on! You have to learn somewhere! Quit being a stupid baby, and punch me!" Ferb yelled.

"Ferb, I could never punch you," Phineas denied.

"Maybe you just need a little motivation," Ferb quipped. He punched Phineas hard in the gut. "I didn't want to have to do that, but I really did," Ferb remarked. "Come on! Get up, or I'll step on your gut!" Phineas got up reluctantly but hastily. "Punch me! Just do it! Punch me, or I'll-" Ferb started. Phineas gave Ferb the wimpiest punch ever recorded. Ferb doubled over in laughter. Then Ferb grabbed Phineas' arms, and pulled the poor boy into a choke hold. But he did not choke him, and wouldn't think of it. He had no intention of suffocating his brother. "What are you going to do now, huh? I could kill you right now if I wanted to, so what are you going to do?" Ferb asked. Phineas struggled and wiggled before analyzing Ferb's posture. He was leaning back. So Phineas leaned back on top of Ferb, causing him to crash down onto the grass. "Ow! Very good. I'll quit picking on you for now," Ferb informed. Phineas was pooped. He thought about his time with Ferb and how it might be good to compare it to his situation with Isabella.

"She wants to be my fighting partner! Of course!" he thought. Isabella walked through the gate. "Isabella! I know why you want to be part of my destiny! You want to be my fighting partner!" Phineas exclaimed, thinking he had gotten it right. Isabella doubled over laughing.

"Hopefully not!" she answered. "That couldn't be farther from the answer," she informed.

"Oh," Phineas responded. "You want to watch the clouds?" Phineas asked.

"Not now! I actually just wanted to say hi; I have a dentist appointment," Isabella explained.

"Oh," Phineas responded.

"Bye!" Isabella finished.

"Bye," Phineas muttered.

· · ·

Ferb called Dana.

"Hello, this is Dana," Dana informed.

"Hi, this is Ferb, Froyo's bud," Ferb explained.

"Ah, you must mean business, then, if you dealt with that nut," Dana retorted.

"Indeed. I want to fill the position of Monty Monogram," Ferb responded. He knew how to take cues from who he talked to.

"Really! I can't stand that kid! I could almost smirk right now! But we wouldn't want that, would we?" Dana tested.

"I do want to remove Monty Monogram from his position as the most popular kid," Ferb ignored.

"Wow, smart, quippy, and personable- Hmm, you just might be able to fill Monty's shoes," Dana admitted.

"So can you hook me up?" Ferb inquired. Dana liked something about Ferb's wording.

"Sure," Dana agreed. "What are you doing Friday?"

"X and y, why?" Ferb quipped.

"Good answer. So, let me give you Danny's number. You have to greet him with a password. From there, he will hook you up directly to those who can replace Monty with you. But I can't tell you over the phone; my superiors would kill me. That is, his phone number and the password. They have to be delivered separately. We'll send a couple agents to a couple meeting places. Tell me, do you have any unique facial feature or equivalent?" Dana wondered.

"Green hair," Ferb answered.

"K, so Googleplex Mall at 4 and the Slushy Dawg at Chestnut St. at 5?" Dana proposed.

"Today?" Ferb inquired.

"Mhm," Dana confirmed.

"Sounds great," Ferb responded.

"That's it, then?" Dana wondered.

"Mhm," Ferb answered. Dana hung up. Ferb took a slow, steady breath.

· · ·

Phineas sighed. He had talked with his sister, and she gave him nothing. He still had no idea why Isabella cared about his destiny. Of course, Candace hadn't realized that Phineas had a time limit.

"Hi, Phineas, what you doing?" Isabella greeted.

"Making skateboards that hover," Phineas answered. As often happened, he got inspiration from what Candace said she despised. That is why the Phineas idea was abnormally classy.

"Making? I thought you stopped making things," Isabella stated.

"Candace inspired me, and I couldn't just let the idea consume me," Phineas explained.

"Are they done?" Isabella asked.

"One of them is," Phineas answered. "You want to build yours, like old times?"

"Sure," an entranced Isabella answered.

"Let's get started, then," Phineas suggested.

"Of course," a tipsy Isabella agreed. Once again, Phineas was completely oblivious to her state of mind.

"What color do you want it?" Phineas asked.

"White, what other color?" Isabella plotted hysterically.

"Okay," a confused Phineas answered. He thought she was going to pick pink. But Isabella never would have wanted a pink wedding dress, right? Phineas, of course, was nowhere close to making this connection.

"And I want a train that is at least 200 feet long!" she muttered. Phineas tilted his head and looked at her curiously. "And I want Pachelbel's Canon in D, not C!"

"Isabella, are you okay?" Phineas asked.

She awoke from her trance with a start. With a florid face, she fled.

Phineas didn't know where he had went wrong.

His cup was confusion, frustration, and fear, chiefly the third.

· · ·

The Googleplex Mall was almost completely empty. Then the agent spotted Ferb. "Hello, Ferb. Who did you talk to on the phone at noon?" the agent tested.

"Dana," Ferb responded.

"And her last name?" the agent continued.

"I don't know her surname; she never mentioned it," Ferb explained.

"Good; no one does," the agent responded. "Here's the D's phone number, but call him Danny if you want him to respect you. Also, you need the password," the agent informed. Then the agent left.

· · ·

Ferb arrived at the Slushy Dawg. The agent saw him at the same time as he saw the agent. "Hello, Ferb. Who did you talk to an hour ago?" the agent tested.

"You," Ferb answered. This confused the agent. "Or one of your colleagues."

"Ah, yes," the agent responded. That was the answer he was looking for. The agent handed Ferb a slip of paper and fled.

 **I think I'll end this chapter short. Ferb doesn't know what he is getting himself into. Don't worry, things are about to get a lot worse, although it is gradual. Review whether you think Dana, Froyo, or Hans should play a bigger part. As of now, they are probably not going to be more than mentioned in future chapters. :-þ And, that's a wrap; a juicy chicken wrap. Mmm...**


	10. Coming Together

Phineas got up to a new summer day. He got dressed and made his bed. He couldn't investigate this Isabella thing anymore. It was consuming him. "Why does she care about my destiny?" Phineas asked himself, again. He went outside and laid underneath the tree where he once would sit. He needed to cover double the area, because Ferb wasn't there to sit beside him. This helped him maintain his mental homeostasis. Isabella came through the gate. "Hi Isabella," Phineas greeted. "Do you want to go out with me?" He was completely oblivious to the fact that those words had another meaning. Isabella froze. Had he figured it out? Her jaw dropped. "What? I just thought you might like to eat out some place," Phineas explained. Isabella turned from shocked to disappointed. "Did I say something wrong?" Phineas wondered.

"No, it's fine," Isabella prevaricated.

"You don't look like you slept well last night," Phineas remarked.

"No, I didn't," she agreed. "Where do you want to go?"

· · ·

"Chipinra-45, Chipinra-45, do you read?" Ferb asked. That was the password.

"Yes, this is Danny, who is this?" Danny replied. "What do you call for?"

"Ferb, I spoke to one of your secretaries, and she scheduled two appointments with me. She gave me the phone number in one and the password in the other. Why I'm here: I want to replace Monty Monogram," Ferb explained.

"Sounds great," Danny responded. "Two days before school starts, come to the back of the Googleplex mall, there will be a brawl. Tell me, how will we recognize you?"

"I have green hair," Ferb replied.

"Ok, I'll check with my superiors, Thaddeus and Th-lima bean! I mean, ugh, sorry!" Danny tripped up. "I think I drank too much last night." This was not something Ferb would have liked to know; he ignored it. It disturbed him. So Thaddeus and Thor were the top of the top, Ferb realized. He really wished he didn't have to do this. But he had gotten to the point of no return, in his infatuation with Vanessa and in this process he was going through. "Yeah, it's a go," Danny confirmed. "Bye bye." Then he hung up. Now all Ferb had to do was wait.

"Wait, did he say 'brawl'? Nah," Ferb dismissed.

· · ·

Buford gave Baljeet's face one more pole before finally hanging him over his shoulder. Baljeet got battered like this all the time. Buford smirked and left the scene. What he didn't realize was that Baljeet was suffering from brain damage, and it was all his fault.

 **This chapter was short. Why? Because I am getting ready to do one of those fast forwards. It is all coming together. And that is going to take us, next chapter, to the penultimate day of summer. What happens between is absolutely boring and unimportant. Phineas makes pretty much no progress with that enigma, and Ferb doesn't talk much, but Candace does get a new piece of Ducky Momo memorabilia, not that that is important. *yawn* The action starts next chapter. The war has not commenced yet. Don't worry; it's going to get a lot worse. Review what should happen to Baljeet, good or hilariously bad. Now whatever you do, don't eat an omelet.**


	11. First Brawl

Ferb woke up. It was the penultimate day of summer, the one he had been waiting for. "To the Googleplex mall!" Ferb thought. He got ready and went down the stairs, almost tripping over Candace's new Ducky Momo air purifier. "Candace!" Ferb bellowed. "Throw this thing in the trash or the basement!"

Candace rushed in and saw what Ferb was yelling about. "No, Ferb, it's purifying air," Candace countered.

"It won't be for long," Ferb responded.

"You wouldn't," Candace stated.

"I would," Ferb contradicted.

"Tell me you're better than yelling at me over a Ducky Momo air purifier, Ferb," Candace requested.

Ferb had no response to that. Ferb looked back at all the awful things he had done this summer. This wasn't him! He grew very regretful of all of the things he made his family put up with. "I'm sorry," Ferb apologized.

Candace looked shocked. This wasn't Ferb, recent Ferb, that is. He left out the door. He wasn't sarcastic or snotty, he was sincere. Candace smiled a genuine smile. Meanwhile, Phineas stirred. He had gotten one hour of sleep only, because he was up all night thinking about Isabella and why she cared about his destiny. He rolled over on his bed, or raft, because his bed is kind of like that. He got up warily and stumbled across the room. His mood and movement were staggered, haphazard, lopsided, and sluggish. He almost tripped on an invention in his path. He went out to the backyard, let himself down in the dirt, and passed out. Isabella came in the gate. As soon as she saw him sleeping, she thought that it was the most adorable thing ever. She sat two feet from him, expecting for him to wake up. He did not wake up, however. She put a leaf on his face, hummed an obnoxious tune in his ear, and nudged him. He still refused to stir. She admired his adorableness for a couple more minutes. Then, a radical thought entered her mind. What if she kissed Phineas while he was sleeping? Her mind told her to back off, but her heart said to go for it. It was back-breakingly hilarious to watch her nervously zero in on him. Inch by inch, she crept closer. If she had heard a pin drop, she would have jumped. Her heart was pounding in her chest. She knew she wanted to kiss him once, even if he rejected her or didn't figure it out. She was in position. She felt that there was no turning back. She vigorously hoped he wouldn't wake up. She made her move. There his lips were, relaxing like twin doves seen through the crosshairs of a sniper rifle. Their lips were almost touching now; there was just one solitary inch proximity. Then she kissed him. She had meant to make it short, but it lasted for about two minutes. He had to have been eating honey out of the jar the night before, Isabella decided. Then he stirred. She jumped back faster than a man from a two-yard long cockroach. She ran out of the backyard and hid behind the gate. When she saw him sit up, she went back in.

"Hey, Phineas, whatcha' doin'?" Isabella greeted.

"Um, uh, uh," Phineas blabbed.

"Are you okay? You seem tongue-tied," Isabella remarked, as if she was unaware.

"Hum, uh, huh," Phineas muttered.

"Hello? Phineas?" Isabella beckoned.

"Wah," Phineas responded with the little consciousness she had left.

Now Isabella was weirded out. "Um, excuse me?" Isabella summoned. "Candace! Could you come over here?"

"Sure," Candace responded. Seeing Candace's face snapped him to reality.

"Oh, wow, um, uh, I had this dream," Phineas explained.

"Really?" Candace prompted.

"Yeah, um-" Phineas started. Then he saw that Isabella was there. His florid countenance spoke novels about how he felt. He found himself unable to speak. His pupils were the size of marbles and his unkempt hair sprawled out even more.

"Phineas? Are you okay?" Isabella asked. Phineas uttered nothing in response. He just started at Isabella, mouth agape. "Candace," Isabella beckoned.

"Phineas," Candace called. Her voice woke Phineas up from his trance.

"Uh huh?" Phineas prompted.

"Can I talk to you in private?" Candace requested.

"Okay," Phineas responded. Candace motioned for Isabella to wait. Candace took Phineas inside.

Meanwhile, Ferb was just arriving at the Googleplex Mall. Ferb found a seat on the bleachers to watch the event. "And for the fights, we will pick predetermined people from the crowd to compete," the announcer explained. "For our first fight, we have Django Brown vs. Mack Fink." Those two boys were shoved into the arena. The battle was very bad. Mack ended up surrendering to Django. They could fight any way the wanted, so long as it did not include weapons. Both boys came out injured. More and more fights occurred, and it came to Ferb that these brawls were probably illegal. "And for our final fight, the only fight to the death today, Monty Monogram vs. Ferb Fletcher," the announcer informed. Ferb got shoved into the arena.

Meanwhile, Candace was having a talk with Phineas. "What was your dream about?" Candace asked. "Isabella?"

Phineas couldn't contain his ruddy embarrassment. "In my dream, we were kissing, and it felt so good, but so wrong, and when I was out there, I realized why I care about Isabella's destiny. I think I, I, oh, this isn't coming out right," Phineas explained, while rushing through his words so fast, Candace could barely catch them. "And Isabella says she wants me to figure out myself why she cares about my destiny by tomorrow, or she'll stop coming over, and the next time I'll glimpse her is going to be in a supermarket in twenty years, and-" Phineas sped.

"You want to know why Isabella cares about your destiny? Phhh! Obvious! Do you want me to tell you?" Candace asked.

"Yes, but don't tell Isabella I heard from you," Phineas responded.

"Do my chores first!" Candace slammed.

"Please! I need to know now!" Phineas pleaded.

"After," Candace stated. Then she went outside to catch up with Isabella on life and school politics.

Meanwhile, Ferb regained his senses. Monty was charging at him. Ferb sidestepped the attack and kicked him hard between the legs underneath the large intestine. Monty pulled Ferb down on the ground and Ferb bit Monty's finger. Monty howled in pain and elbowed Ferb in the spleen. Ferb shrieked in pain and threw Monty to the side. This brawl was not over.

 **This chapter was fun to write. :-) More violence next chapter! Review me your thoughts, ideas, and responses. Was it a good idea for Ferb to go to the Googleplex Mall? What will Vanessa think? Should I make the chapter after next Monogram Entry Journal 2? This is so not like me, to end this way...**


	12. Lack Of Malice

**Warning! Intense brawling in this chapter! And blood! You have been warned!**

Ferb slammed Monty with his shoulder haphazardly. Monty fell flat on his face. He got up in a rage. He charged Ferb, knocking him to the ground. Monty grinned as he shoved his foot at Ferb's gut. Ferb fell over in searing pain. The crowd was cheering. "Finsih him!" one boy shouted. Monty walked up to Ferb triumphantly, ready to finish him. Then Ferb's mind went into overdrive. He took Monty's legs out from underneath him. The resounding thud permeated through the atmosphere. Ferb rose swiftly like a corkscrew, and kicked Monty in the head. The crowd started cheering again. "Finish him! Finish him now!" one boy screamed. When Ferb saw the blood in Monty's hair, he stopped in his tracks. A flashback started as Ferb staggered back. Fragments of glass and a woman with blood in her hair... "Kill him!" the nasty crowd shouted. But while Ferb did not lack disdain, he lacked malice. He plowed his way through the crowd as the "referees" tried and failed to stop him. He wasn't killing anybody. Ferb came back home with bruises all over from tumbling and getting nailed, specifically in the gut. He fell down on his bed and knew something needed to change. He knew he had changed drastically from who he used to be, perhaps for the worst, but when did it all start? Ferb thought hard. Maybe it wasn't any one thing, but many. He lost interest in Perry, gained a significant amount of interest in Vanessa, lost interest in inventing, but those didn't seem to be the big one. So why was he so unhappy? Ferb was puzzled by this enigma. His mother was making more healthy, less tasty foods lately. Maybe that was it? Maybe he had just heard too much of that Ducky Momo crud, or maybe he was having nightmares that he didn't consciously remember. But deep down, Ferb knew the real reason he was like this, and it pained him to think about it.

Phineas sighed. He was washing dishes for his sister, when he could be spending time with Isabella. He wanted to scream. But he still did her chores for her. When he returned to Candace, she mouthed these words: "The deal is off." Phineas felt cheated. He opened his mouth in protest.

"...and that is why I never go to Shchildre's Tunisian Barber shop," Isabella explained.

"Ouch, but that still doesn't sound as bad as that one time Mom went to that barber shop that was a fly-by-night or whatever. You know, they cut your hair offering a refund if you don't like the haircut, and then they're out of business before you can get your money back?" Candace related.

Phineas was bored with this conversation. "Don't you have something to do?" Phineas interjected at Candace. This caused Isabella to blush with excitement. Phineas, for once, actually wanted to be alone with her.

"Why, yes," Candace answered curtly. She stormed off. Isabella looked confused towards the direction Candace went.

"You don't need to worry about her," Phineas consoled. Phineas' voice soothed her thoroughly. She embraced him, and when she heard his heart beating in his chest, she felt an urge to blow it all, to tell Phineas everything, because she never wanted to leave his arms, but she planned to.

"What if Phineas didn't find out why I cared about his destiny, but I didn't leave at all anyway?" Isabella thought. It was so tempting, but Isabella had a plan, and it didn't involve Phineas, unless he found out himself, by tomorrow. She didn't like breaking promises, even the ones she made to herself. She decided that she had to get him to find out somehow. But she stopped herself. That was the "I'm within five feet of Phineas." talking. She shoved the idea that she was going to come over tomorrow and never see Phineas again down her own throat, and it was like eating a PEZ candy dispenser.

"Isabella, are you okay? You seem tense," Phineas observed.

"Tense! No! I'm not tense! Why would you think- Why would you think I was tense?" Isabella lied.

"Isabella, you can tell me absolutely anything," Phineas soothed. Isabella almost fell into Phineas Land before tensing up again. Why did real Phineas have to be so similar to Phineas Land Phineas, as of late? They still had different kissing records, but as far as by what they said, Isabella couldn't tell the difference. Well, besides things like proposals and love confessions, that is. "Isabella, are you okay? You seem unfocused," Phineas observed again.

"I am. Do you want to count clouds?" Isabella responded.

"Uh, sure," Phineas responded. The dilution of that affirmative didn't sit well with Isabella.

"Look at that cloud! It's a-" Phineas started.

"I said count!" Isabella sniped.

"Isabella, are you okay?" Phineas inquired.

"I'm fine, thank you very much!" Isabella muttered.

"What's wrong?" Phineas asked.

"Nothing!" Isabella responded.

"Isabella, I know something is wrong. Can't you tell me so I can fix it?" Phineas examined. "Wait, are you crying?"

Isabella turned her head away from him.

"Isabella!" Phineas cried.

"Leave me alone," Isabella deadpanned.

"Isa-" Phineas started.

"Leave me alone!" Isabella interjected.

Phineas ran to embrace her, and she failed to turn away. He saw the tears on her cheeks and lifted his hand. He wiped them from her eyes, not realizing he was just making it worse for her.

"I, um," Isabella started. Why was it so hard for her to leave? It was obvious to her that Phineas didn't like her that way. Isabella started thinking. What if she couldn't do it? These thoughts raced through her head. What if he did?

"Who did this?" Phineas inquired. "Who hurt you?"

Isabella didn't respond.

"Is this about the destiny thing?" Phineas asked.

Isabella made a move to turn away.

"I'll take that as a yes," Phineas stated. "Tell me at least how to find out about why you care about my destiny."

"I can't," Isabella replied.

Phineas covered his eyes.

"Why?" Phineas asked.

"If I told you, it would be like telling you why I care," Isabella answered.

Phineas' mind looped.

"Why do you care? And more importantly, why won't you day after tomorrow?" he inquired.

"Because that is when I am going to give up," Isabella responded.

"But, Isabella! I want to fulfill whatever destiny you have for me," Phineas stated.

"You don't mean that," Isabella muttered.

"Why wouldn't I want to?" Phineas asked.

"I can't tell you," Isabella responded.

"No, why wouldn't I want to with the information I have right now?" Phineas inquired.

"I don't know, you have other plans for your life," Isabella suggested.

"Well, I don't," Phineas responded.

"But you do," Isabella challenged.

"What plans?" Phineas countered.

"I don't know; that's why I asked," Isabella explained.

"I'm supposed to plan my life out? How?" Phineas blabbed.

"Never mind," Isabella ended.

"I mean, I want a house, a couple cars, and kids, I guess. I don't know! I haven't really thought about it much," Phineas explained.

Isabella's jaw dropped. She had been spending her whole life planning her life, and he hadn't thought about it once. He wanted kids. She redirected her thoughts quickly. She absolutely could not think about that right now. An image struck her mind of a grown up Phineas holding her while she held a baby boy. She was in utter panic. She couldn't have these thoughts, not now, with Phineas not finding out and her never seeing him again. More and more images of their children flooded through her mind like water. She didn't want her soul forever fused to his; not now. This would be the hardest thing she had ever done, but she was going to do it.

"I don't know what I want to do with my life, I guess. I hope it doesn't get dull. Beyond that, I have no plans. Carpe Diem, they say. It seems like I was twelve just yesterday. I thought I was going to invent myself to the moon, though I guess I've done that before. I guess that that is just a void. I've built a rollercoaster, seen Atlantis, become an astronaut, gone into my own sister's mind, conjured a giant balloon, and I feel like, I don't know, I've done everything. Isabella, I don't know what I should do next. Maybe get a driver's license?" Phineas related.

"I don't know," Isabella responded. Even though Phineas was talking about himself, Isabella felt like he was talking about her.

"There are 53 clouds up there," Phineas concluded.

Just then, Ferb came out. "Hi, Phineas," he greeted. "Um, hi, Isabella."

"Hi, Ferb," Phineas deadpanned. Isabella put her hand up in silent greeting. "Boisterous," Ferb commented.

"Yeah," Phineas agreed with a lighthearted chuckle in his tone. Isabella's temperament darkened when Ferb arrived. It wasn't his recent snarkiness as much as the fact that he wasn't Phineas. She wanted all the alone time with Phineas she allotted herself, and Ferb was cutting into it.

"I have an apology to make. I haven't been myself lately, and I, I don't really have anything else to say. It is just- I don't know, it just- Why can't I form sentences today? I used to always be able to. I don't know whether I need warm pie, or lithium, or some sort of therapist, but I just can't get back to that mindset I once had. I'm sorry if that has affected you," Ferb apologized.

"It's fine. I'm just glad you're back!" Phineas responded.

"I'm not back," Ferb corrected.

"Oh," Phineas responded monotonously. "Maybe we just need to invent something."

"It isn't that simple," Ferb explained.

"Why not?" Phineas asked.

"It just isn't. If it were, I'd be myself right now," Ferb replied.

"But you are yourself right now," Phineas pointed out.

"That isn't the point," Ferb explained. "I am not in the state of mind I used to be in, that which I strived for." His countenance was downcast, and his temperament was that of a traveller. Isabella could relate. Phineas was one of those people who just didn't understand except when it was obvious. That was why she made that promise to herself. She regretted every word of it. What she'd give to get liplocked with Phineas. Pure, raw hunger flew threw her veins. Her anguish was gargantuan.

"How are you going to get back to that state of mind?" Phineas confronted. Ferb knew the answer. But something was holding him back. Like a bulldog chained to a post, Ferb struggled with his collar while his panic spread through him and corrupted peaceful cells.

"I don't know if I'm ever going to get back," Ferb responded.

Phineas grew quiet. His frown said everything. He was freaked about losing Isabella and never getting Ferb back. Buford had turned, and Phineas hadn't seen Baljeet in a while.

"What is your latest endeavor?" Isabella inquired.

"Funny you asked, escaped a fight to the death, no kidding, but thanks for asking," Ferb answered.

Isabella's eyes widened. Their lives really had gone downhill.

"It needed to happen," Ferb related, confusing Phineas and Isabella.

"Why?" Phineas asked in a baffled tone.

"It was a rite of passage," Ferb answered.

"You killed someone?!" Isabella gasped.

"No! Of course not!" Ferb responded promptly. "I escaped while the other guy lay unconscious!"

"A rite of passage into what?" Phineas inquired.

"The cool kids at school, but at ours, it's more of an empire," Ferb explained.

"Why, Ferb?" Phineas asked. Ferb ignored Phineas' childish cuteness and acted as if he actually respected his brother, because he wanted to, even though he didn't.

"I fell in love," Ferb answered. He sounded drunk when he said this.

"What do you mean?" Phineas inquired.

"My heart beats fast when I see her, I smile whenever I see her, you know, stuff like that," Ferb explained.

"Tell me more," Phineas begged.

"When I'm near her, I have sudden urges. She's always somewhere in my mind, and I know I have to pursue her and never let go," Ferb explained. "It consumes you, and pretty soon she's all you care about. That is what happened."

"What kind of urges?" Phineas asked with innocence.

"Urges that have to do with close proximity," Ferb responded.

Phineas looked a little shocked. Isabella noticed it. She sent a prayer out that Phineas might confess his love for her before the first day of school. A million thoughts flew through Phineas' mind. It went something like this: "I'm in love with Isabella, and tomorrow is the last day I'll ever see her. Holy ****!"

 **And so the chapter ends. This chapter took sooo long to write. It makes me want to cry. Review suggestions for what should happen on the last day of summer, that is, the following day. Have a merry Christmas! It is less than a week away. Ciao! (Whoa! New exit phrase!) :-)**


	13. Last Day Of Summer

Phineas woke. It hit him that this was the last day of summer. He knew he had to get that vital information, now! He thought he'd interrogate his mother first. He got dressed quickly. "Mom, I need to find something out. If I don't find out why Isabella cares about my destiny by the end of today, she is going to never come back," Phineas exclaimed.

"You're joki-" his mother started.

"I'm dead serious!" Phineas yelled.

"Phineas Flynn, don't talk to your mother that way!" Linda scolded.

"I'm sorry," Phineas apologized.

"I accept your apology," Linda responded.

"Mom, I need you to tell me why she cares about my destiny," Phineas explained.

"Are you in love with her?" Linda asked.

Phineas blushed at this. "Yes," Phineas admitted.

Linda wasted no more time. "She loves you. She has a crush on you. She wants to be your girlfriend. Know it or not, you've broken her heart. I'd be very careful and hasty right now. What you need to do is tell her that you know these things, that you are in love with her, and ask her to be your girlfriend, and when she asks you for something, don't hesitate to do it," Linda explained.

"So the answer to the question?" Phineas asked.

"Isabella cares about your destiny because she is in love with you," Linda answered.

"Thanks, Mom. Oh, and Isabella must never hear of this talk we have had, ever," Phineas informed.

"Got it," Linda responded.

Phineas went outside. It was a cloudy day, almost overcast. Isabella came in through the gate. Phineas could feel himself lighting up. "Hey, Phineas, whatcha' doin'?" Isabella asked. Time seemed to stop. "Do you have the answer to the question yet?" Isabella inquired hopefully.

"Yes," Phineas muttered. "I think."

"And what would that be?" Isabella asked normally.

Phineas' tongue refused to move.

"Phineas, the fact that you aren't responding isn't helping!" Isabella exclaimed.

"I, uh," Phineas started.

Isabella waited impatiently. "Phineas, is your brain broken or something?" she asked. Her own words aroused excitement in her. Did he figure it out? Did he choose her?

Phineas nodded his head haphazardly.

"Phineas," Isabella beckoned. "Phineas!"

"What?! Oh, sorry," Phineas apologized. He could almost taste her lips from there. His heart was beating faster than a speeding car. He felt something moving inside of him.

Isabella was completely oblivious to all of this.

"Fine, if that's how you want to be," Isabella muttered.

Phineas got up immediately. "Wait! Isabella!"

"What?" Isabella murmured frustrated.

Phineas couldn't get words to come again.

"Never mind," Isabella muttered as she lay down in the grass unhappily.

Phineas lay down a foot away. He felt uneasy doing so, as if it wasn't his place. Isabella placed her left hand in his right.

"Look at that cloud," Isabella motioned.

"It looks like a, raindrop?" Phineas wondered.

"Hmm, I guess you could say that," Isabella agreed.

"What about that one, right next to us?" Phineas asked.

"It looks like a warhead exploding on thin air," Isabella responded.

"Cumulonimbus," Phineas muttered.

"What?" Isabella asked. Suddenly, rain permeated their garments faster than a mosquito on skin. They both got up immediately. They ran to the screen door.

Ferb stuck his tongue out from behind the glass. Phineas led Isabella to the front door, where the eve shielded them from the rain. He had no urge to try the door; he knew Ferb was smarter than that, and had already locked it.

"Isabella, are you okay?" Phineas asked.

She blushed this time. "I'm fine," she replied.

"Sorry, I just, I worry about you," Phineas admitted. Maybe he should tell her how he felt before he told her he knew how she felt. "I don't ever want to lose you." Even though he said it in an explanatory tone, it was really a plead. He knew how she felt, but he didn't know how to say so. "I made a PowerPoint presentation on that."

"Ookay," Isabella retreated. That was not the most romantic thing Phineas ever said. He had just gone from Romeo with pecs to nerd on the sidewalk.

"What? Did I say something wrong?" Phineas asked.

Isabella face palmed in utter disbelief. Now she was remembering why she wanted to leave Phineas. He had improved a lot, but now and then, his inner weirdness shone through. She thought that she might still be in love with what Phineas had become, but she was so over who Phineas used to be: who he really was.

Phineas was getting to the part where he was going to tell her that he loved her and knew she loved him.

But alas, alas, Isabella took steps toward her house.

"Isabella! You aren't leaving, are you?" Phineas asked, full of fear. "I know why you care about my destiny!"

"It doesn't even matter anymore," Isabella responded. "You know why?"

Phineas shook his head in utter fear.

"I don't care about your destiny anymore. Heck, I don't even care about you, period," Isabella turned.

"What? No! But I wanted to be your boyfriend, and husband, and, I thought that was the reason you cared about my destiny," Phineas cried.

"It was; I don't know what possessed me, but I am so over you!" Isabella shouted.

"NO! PLEASE! I'LL DO ANYTHING FOR JUST ONE MORE DAY!" Phineas screamed.

Isabella turned her back on Phineas.

"DON'T LEAVE ME ALL BY MYSELF! Please," Phineas begged. "I can't live without you," he stated. He stood in her way to leave. She was a little rattled by this.

"Let me go!" Isabella shouted.

"Not if you don't swear that you'll come back," Phineas responded. She tried to run past him, but he tackled her in a hug. She couldn't find mental strength to rebuke him as he held her for what might be the last time. She could feel her heart tugging against her own will. She expected Phineas to let go, but after forty-five seconds, it was obvious he really didn't want to let go. Phineas looked on in horror as she left across the street. He stared at her more intensely than he had ever before, hoping that by some stray chance, she would come back. Then he heard the most painful sound of all: Isabella shutting the door as she walked into her own dwelling place. That was the sound of Isabella shutting the door of their relationship for an unknown amount of time that was probably forever. Phineas stood like a statue as the sky rained down gallons of water upon his poor soul. His eyes were raining too, more than they ever had before. Maybe if he stayed right there, in the moment, Isabella wouldn't seem far. He put his hands out, both palms up, and watched the rain hit his fingers. They started shaking. "I just lost," Phineas admitted to himself. "I just lost everything important to me. Why, God, why?!" Lightning struck in the distance. The crack of thunder didn't make Phineas feel any better. It can be called coincidence, but that timing was something else. If God was against him, how could he stand? Phineas cowered in fear. Phineas knocked on the front door, Ferb opened it. "Thanks for ruining my life," Phineas spat. Ferb's countenance was one of shock, while only bitterness permeated from Phineas'. "Thanks to your little prank, Isabella left and she isn't coming back, ever," Phineas informed.

"Wait, seriously? I'm sorry," Ferb apologized.

"The damage is already done," Phineas muttered as tears travelled down his face like vagabonds.

Ferb gave him an unexpected hug.

Phineas cried into his brother's shoulder.

 **This chapter is Phineas' first and perhaps only low point. He just lost Isabella. I cried when I wrote this. At least he has Ferb, who has been thinking about his actions more lately, not that that unknown problem is fixed. Review your thoughts, constructive criticisms, and heartfelt emotions. Ok, that may have sounded a teensy bit corny. XD**


	14. First Day Of School

Phineas woke. Linda had been trying to wake him for five minutes. "Phineas! It is the first day of school! I don't want you to miss the bus!" she shouted. Phineas got up quickly, got dressed, grabbed his backpack, and rushed to the door. He saw the bus was there, and Ferb was getting on. He had come just in time. He boarded the bus, and looked for an empty seat. He found one next to Isabella, who wasn't paying attention. She looked up in shock to find Phineas sitting next to her. "Hi, Isabella," Phineas greeted. Isabella couldn't have this. She had cut her ties with Phineas, and now he was trying to weasel his way back into her life. "Isabella, I'm sorry," Phineas muttered. "For what? Sitting on the bus next to me?" Isabella inquired. "No, I'm sorry I ever came into your life," Phineas muttered without disdain, but with intense sorrow. He covered his face so no one could see his tears. No! This wasn't what was supposed to happen! Isabella's romantic side cried out. He was slowly changing her temperament and her attitude, whether she liked it or not. He didn't know how much power he had, if only he knew how to wield it. He could ultimately defeat every heartbreak and wipe every tear, if he had guidance. "Well, I have mixed feelings about it," she admitted. "Why?" Phineas asked.

Now Isabella was tearing up. "Well, it is better to try and fail than never try at all, right?" she muttered.

"How did you fail?" Phineas asked her. "Why I failed, I-" she started. "How, not why," Phineas responded.

Isabella grew quiet.

"And what did you try for? Us?" Phineas continued. "You don't have to fail."

"I didn't fail," Isabella stated. "You failed."

"Forgive me," Phineas begged quietly.

"For sitting next to me?" Isabella inquired.

"Yes, but I was not talking about that," Phineas stated. He gave a pregnant pause. "Forgive me for whatever you left me for."

"No," Isabella accelerated. Their conversation went dead. She was using up every drop of self-control. She fought magnetic urges. They were both different charges and she couldn't seem to stop them from facing each other. The pull was like neodymium, pulling every cell in her body.

"Why?" Phineas inquired.

"Figure it out yourself," she enunciated curtly.

"Isabella, we've been down this road before," Phineas countered.

Those words ignited something inside her, desires, lusts, anticipations, and she knew she had to kill it.

"Yep, the bus always goes down this one," she stated.

"You know, that's not what I meant," Phineas stated back.

Then the bus unloaded. All of the students went in to the cafeteria, where they would wait to be led to the corresponding classroom. Phineas muttered something to Isabella, but she ignored him. He glimpsed Ferb talking and laughing with some unfamiliar kids. He blinked. They were lining up now. Before he knew it, they were in their homeroom. His teacher this year was none other than Heinz Doofenshmirtz. "Welcome to Evil- I mean perfectly good Science!" Heinz sputtered. He was a little weird. "Take a seat anywhere. These seating positions aren't set in stone, so bear with me."

Phineas sat to the right of Isabella, much to her dismay.

"I have a really cool way to learn all of your names," Heinz started.

"To start, boy in the blue striped shirt, hand out these popsicle sticks. Each person gets one. You write your full name on it, and no funny business, or else. I am pairing you with a random classmate for our first science project."

Soon, all of the popsicle sticks were filled out and in the can.

"Froyo Davis, please stand," Heinz instructed. "Wow, Froyo is your real name? Your parents must have hated you."

Heinz didn't even notice the anger in his eyes.

"Ignacio Fernando, please stand," Heinz requested. "You two will be lab partners for our first project."

Phineas noticed that Heinz had written their names next to their faces.

"Baljeet Tjinder, please stand," Heinz requested. "Okay, you don't have to give me the zombie look."

Heinz was so oblivious.

"Ferb Fletcher, please stand," Heinz instructed. "You and Baljeet will be lab partners for our first project."

"Gretchen Brown, please stand," Heinz requested.

"Hans Chapman, please stand," Heinz instructed. "You two will be lab partners for our first project."

The two didn't look necessarily happy, but they didn't look like they minded each other.

"Ginger Hirano, please stand," Heinz requested.

"Fiona Helen Gruber, please stand," Heinz requested. "You two will be lab partners for our first project as well."

"Isabella Garcia-Shapiro, please stand," Heinz continued.

"Phineas Flynn, please stand," Heinz requested. "You two will be lab partners for our first project too. Blah, I have said that too many times."

 **Muwahaha. Did you see this coming? :-þ If so, have a virtual chocolate chip cookie. Review your thoughts, brainchildren, and constructive criticisms. Now go, hug a burrito!**


	15. First Day Of School (continued)

Isabella could not believe this. As Heinz Doofenshmirtz continued to pair people up, Isabella panicked inwardly. She was tearing at the seams, and Phineas' mere presence would fully seduce her, she thought. She was so close to being free from him, just a couple more steps back, until he would no longer feel he had the license to talk to her. Then a question hit her square in the head. "Why am I running from Phineas?" she asked herself. She knew she sort of had an answer. He was like a drug. She knew, because her mother told her about how her aunt had taken drugs. When this had happened, it struck her how similar her problem was to her deceased aunt's.

"Okay, now that everyone is paired up, let's get started. People who don't finish this in class will have to contact their classmate and do it for homework," Heinz stated. "I have a questionnaire for all of you to fill out," Heinz explained. Ten minutes passed, until everyone had finished filling out the questionnaire. "Come get your instructions for our Bunsen burner activity. I have just enough to give out one per pair of you and have a spare. You know my e-mail is on the board: hdoofenshmirtz . I can send you a virtual copy if you lose yours. All right, does every pair have a set of instructions? Good. You may now start. The equipment is set up on the tables thanks to Mr. Schlapp. If you can't finish this in class, I hope you have a Bunsen burner at home," Heinz stated. The class got to work immediately. Then Ferb spoke up. "Um, Dr. Doofenshmirtz, where is the fuel?" Ferb inquired. "Mr. Schlapp!" Heinz called. Then Norm appeared with a magnetic pin on which was written "Mr. Schlapp". "Please, put the fuel in each of these. I thought you had already done this," Heinz instructed. Norm Schlapp proceeded to put the fuel into each of the Bunsen burners. "Not too much! Goodness, Norm, I thought you were going to pour that stuff everywhere!" Heinz shouted. "Here, just let me do it! Wouldn't want to burn down the place, now would we?" So Heinz proceeded to do this himself. By the time he finished, it was the end of the period. "Yeah, sorry guys; we'll do this tomorrow. Remember your partners, and I'll give you extra credit if you fill out the worksheet with your partner before tomorrow morning. Just use your own Bunsen burners. Take a vial of each of the two unknown substances, and see if you can identify them. For your exit ticket, I am going to ask you all a question. Off the top of your heads, what do you think these substances are?" Heinz asked. Silence ensued. "Speak up!" Heinz beckoned impatiently.

"Water?" Buford guessed.

"Does water produce an odor when you heat it?" Heinz asked back. "You can leave now. Stop! Just the kid in the black skull shirt can leave. The rest of you have not answered my question yet. That is how an exit ticket works."

"Is one hydrogen peroxide and the other isopropyl alcohol?" Ferb asked.

"The other kid was closer," Heinz responded. Then Ferb left to go to break as Buford did. As Heinz continued to chat with classmates, Isabella drifted off. Her emotional exhaustion was showing through in her temperament, even if as a poor reflection in a mirror.

Soon, it was just her and Phineas. Phineas offered for her to go ahead of her nonverbally and politely, but she was in another world. She totally heard none of the conversation between Phineas and Heinz. "The solutions, I could only guess to be pure elements heavily diluted in water," Phineas guessed.

"Wow, you actually guessed it! But what elements? That is the question," Heinz responded.

"I have no idea; well, probably not technetium..." Phineas answered. They both burst into laughter.

"So this one's your girlfriend?" Heinz asked.

"I wish," Phineas answered.

"Oh! I'm so sorry!" Heinz exclaimed. "This is awkward."

"It isn't really a secret," Phineas responded. Heinz felt a lot of sadness eminate from the boy in front of him.

"You are supposed to be in your next class in two minutes; I advise you make a good impression on your next teacher," Heinz advised dully.

Phineas had just sucked all of the air out of the room. "Isabella!" Phineas called.

"Woah!" Isabella exclaimed.

"What are these two solutions?" Heinz asked.

"Sugar water and antifreeze?" Isabella guessed.

"No, but your next class starts in T-1 minute, so I suggest you get a move on," Heinz stated.

"Oh!" Isabella exclaimed. She darted off with Phineas power walking close behind. They got into their line just in time. Soon they were led off to Mrs. Weaver's class. This was English Language Arts class.

"All right, class, come here to get your essay prompt!" Mrs. Weaver exclaimed boringly. "Sit somewhere, and there will be no food in this classroom! You have until the end of class to get this and one other thing done. Come see me when you have finished writing your essay." They all wrote their essays in silence. Before they knew it, they were on to the next class. This was Mr. Francis Monogram's classroom.

"Welcome to history class! I am Mr. Monogram," Francis greeted. "We will be starting with ancient texts, like Hammurabi's code, Gilgamesh, and, of course, the Bible. Open your history books up to page twelve," Monogram instructed. And as Monogram blabbed on about the importance of these ancient texts, each student opened the textbooks set out for them. That class was like thick syrup, but it was better than the one just before it. After that class passed, it was time for lunch. They all went out to the cafeteria to eat. Those who brought home lunches sat down at a table and the others waited in line; Phineas and Isabella both fit into the former group. Phineas earned an angry glare from Isabella when he sat next to her.

"Why?" she inquired.

"Because we need to talk," Phineas answered.

"What do you want?!" Isabella asked in an annoyed tone.

"I think I just told you," Phineas responded.

"I don't want to talk to you! Go away!" she shouted. Then she moved away. She was breaking inside.

Phineas' jaw dropped. He hadn't considered that she'd just leave.

Meanwhile, Ferb was chatting with Danny, Vanessa, and others. Ferb noticed a heavily sulking Monty in the corner of the giant room for a mere jiffy before looking back at Danny, who was talking about state-of-the-art war tanks, and how it felt in the cockpit.

"And I looked, and you could like see this display with, like, a ton of buttons, and I got to drive it," Danny explained.

"Awesome," Cecil replied. "I remember once, my dad took me out hunting, and a shot a deer clean in the eye. Then, there was the time I got to shoot a 45 caliber pistol at small targets."

As they chatted on, Ferb had a predicament. He decided to go with a quick solve. "What are you doing?" Ferb asked Vanessa curiously.

"Trying to get my stupid bracelet on," she responded.

"Do you need any help?" he wondered.

"Sort of, yeah," she answered.

Ferb's careful eyes immediately recognized how to put the thingy into one of the chain thingies, but the problem was that there were multiple chain thingies. Looking at the beautiful form of her wrist, he deducted exactly which one to do.

"Wow, how did you do that so fast?" Vanessa asked.

"I have quick fingers, that's all," Ferb responded humbly.

"I bet you'd be a great magician," Vanessa commented.

"Magic is an interesting thing. You just can't let the audience find out how you did it. It's a lot more than quick fingers, it's understanding of perception, knowing how to visually hide things, knowing how to keep them hidden extremely well so no one suspects a thing, and having the want to actually do it; I think I could pull it off," Ferb stated.

"Ah," Vanessa responded.

"Am I boring you?" Ferb asked, secretly thinking he had just been super stupid.

"No, of course not! Go on," Vanessa answered. Ferb could feel the sweat trickle down his back. He absolutely could not blow this.

"I'd never take it up as a career, though, because I have other aspirations, like entrepreneurship and inventing," he explained.

"My father's an inventor," Vanessa blurted. She regretted the words the moment they came out. She couldn't have anyone from school know her father; it would ruin her popularity.

"Cool, what does he invent?" Ferb responded.

"Well, uh, really stupid stuff," Vanessa muttered.

"Like my brother?" Ferb blurted.

"What does he invent?" Vanessa responded.

"He uses advanced technology and degrades it to a point where all practical use is gone. But that's only half of it," he explained.

Vanessa could tell he did not want to talk about the other half.

As they chatted on, Ferb barely hang on to self-control and his cool, calm, and collected temperament. All he could think about was her in every pregnant pause. It was different parts of her at different times, but most often it was her eyes. He could slowly feel a blush coming on. His embarrassment was like an avalanche in its chain reaction. The more he thought about himself blushing, the more he blushed. The more he blushed, the more he thought about himself blushing.

"What did I say?" Vanessa asked confused.

"What do you mean?" Ferb responded.

"Never mind," Vanessa responded. Then lunch ended abruptly. The rest of school wasn't even noteworthy. Phineas and Isabella were far from each other in the bus. When Phineas, Ferb, Baljeet, Buford, and Isabella got out of the bus, they each went to their own homes. Phineas went in and got the Bunsen burner and fuel from the house and took the two vials, not to mention a cart to carry it all on.

"Mom, I am going to Isabella's for a science project," Phineas stated.

"Okay," Linda responded distantly; she was very focused on her knitting. Then he went outside, across the street, and knocked on Isabella's door. Ferb did the same, but went to Baljeet's. They had each made their own preparations.

"Hello," Phineas greeted.

"Phineas, why are- Oh, that's right," Isabella responded. "That stupid science teacher!"

"You want to come to my house and-" Phineas started.

"Let's just get this over with," Isabella responded as she rushed past him and went to the street. He ran after her and grabbed her arm forcefully as a car sped by at over ninety miles per hour, in their neighborhood. Isabella's started almost hyperventilating.

"Please, don't ever do that again," Phineas responded. She didn't like how well he implied things, like he would be in her life later, and barely save her from the jaws of death, again, like he'd be there every day. She was trying to keep herself free from him. And he had more control over her than he dreamed.

"Let's go," Isabella prompted. Phineas followed her across the street warily. Soon, they had set up the Bunsen burner in the basement, with ample space, and had put the first vial in. "Should I take the cork out?" Isabella asked.

"I think so," Phineas responded. So she did so. Isabella put her nose up to the top of the vial only to notice that Phineas' nose was right where she was putting hers, but too late. Their noses touched. Isabella could feel the neodymium again, but this time it was like holmium was there too. The magnetic field was too much. Pile awkwardness on top of that, and that is a lot to handle. Isabella's blush was like a wildfire. Eventually she realized that their noses were still touching. The smell of chlorine flooded through her nostrils. She was fully overwhelmed.

"It's chlorine," Phineas stated. A reflex came to her and went to be executed. She had no more fire to stop it. Then she grabbed him and kissed him full on the lips. He started kissing back after about half a second. He was confused and delighted for the duration. Eventually they had to break apart, and when they did, they needed some extra oxygen.

"Isabella!" a lovestruck Phineas exclaimed. His heart was pounding in his chest, singing that song which every son of man knows. "Could we, could we, could we do that again?" a tender Phineas inquired. Isabella at this point was at completely at the mercy of Phineas' wishes. This kiss was like a melting chocolate, in consistency and taste. Phineas hadn't ever noticed Isabella's lip gloss before. The taste of a familiar fruit flooded his taste buds. "Isabella, why did you kiss me?" Phineas wondered. Emotional Isabella was in full control now.

"Because I love you, Phineas, even if you hurt me on accident," Isabella replied. The other part of Isabella stirred again. With much regret, she realized she couldn't run now.

"I am truly sorry. Can I make it up to you?" Phineas asked.

"What?" Isabella inquired. "What did you say?" A panicked blush spread across her face.

"Can I make it up to you?" Phineas repeated.

"Oh," Isabella exhaled in relief. "I thought you said something else."

"What else would I have said?" Phineas inquired.

"Never mind," Isabella deadpanned.

"What was this element, again?" Phineas wondered. "Why is my memory so bad all of a sudden?"

· · ·

Ferb arrived at Baljeet's house. Mrs. Tjinder opened the door. "Ferb? What brings you here?" Mrs. Tjinder asked.

"Baljeet and I got an assignment from the science teacher," Ferb explained.

"Come in," Mrs. Tjinder responded. "He's up in his room."

Ferb ascended the stairs with the vials and the burner, and then finally, the fuel, and the cart and the other stuff. Then he found Baljeet's bedroom door open. "Baljeet, it's Ferb," Ferb greeted.

"Mm," Baljeet grunted in response. He was laying on his side on his bed. "Ferb, I 'aven't felt so good as 'f late," Baljeet muttered.

Ferb was shocked. How had his friend deteriorated so quickly? Maybe it hadn't been quick, Ferb hadn't thought about Baljeet for a long time, because he was a nerd, but he was still better than Ferb's brother.

"All 'dos smarts, owt da' window," Baljeet explained.

Ferb gasped. "I modified the nerd helmet a while back. I think you could wear it without trying to rid us of the atmosphere," Ferb responded. "Also, you only need to wear it once."

"I'd like it dat," Baljeet responded.

"Let me go back to my house to get it; I'll be right back," Ferb explained. So he did. Then Baljeet put on the helmet and Ferb pressed the button; it was completely different than the original. Baljeet got a little shock. "Alright?" Ferb inquired.

"Ya, but, wait, I said da' letter 'u'!" Baljeet responded. "Can I say da' letter ake? Aw, darn."

"It isn't instantaneous," Ferb stated.

"Wait, instantaneous, instant, but what does instant- Oh, yeah," Baljeet recollected.

"Now let's get to the assignment," Ferb prompted.

 **This took me sooo long to write! I am so glad it is done! So Phineas and Isabella are together! For now... This story is going to take so long to write! Ugh... Anyway, please review what you think I have foreshadowed, or just a brainchild of whatever. :-þ**


	16. Inside the Last Day Of Summer

**Phineas Point Of View**

"What a wonderful morning! Wait, this is the last day of summer! Oh, shoot," I thought as I went to get myself dressed. I went into the kitchen. My mom sat there smiling with my breakfast. I ate it as fast as I could, much to her horror. "Mom, I need to find something out. If I don't find out why Isabella cares about my destiny by the end of today, she is going to never come back," I explained.

"You're joki-" Mom started.

"I'm dead serious!" I yelled.

"Phineas Flynn, don't talk to your mother that way!" she scolded.

"I'm sorry," I retracted.

"I accept your apology," Mom responded.

"Mom, I need you to tell me why she cares about my destiny," I explained.

"Are you in love with her?" Mom asked. I hated that.

"Yes," I admitted.

"She loves you. She has a crush on you. She wants to be your girlfriend. Know it or not, you've broken her heart. I'd be very careful and hasty right now. What you need to do is tell her that you know these things, that you are in love with her, and ask her to be your girlfriend, and when she asks you for something, don't hesitate to do it," Mom explained.

"So the answer to the question?" I asked. I needed specifics and I needed them as soon as possible.

"Isabella cares about your destiny because she is in love with you," she answered.

"Thanks, Mom. Oh, and Isabella must never hear of this talk we have had, ever," I muttered hastily.

"Got it," Mom responded.

I went outside. It was a cloudy day, almost overcast, but some light was peeking through. I was completely unprepared for what came next. Isabella came in through the gate. Everything was like glowing, and I felt a strange wave pass over me. I felt myself light up like a pyrotechnic's excitement gone wrong. This was weird and beautiful.

"Hey, Phineas, whatcha' doin'?" Isabella asked.

Time seemed to stop. It was like staring at a still picture for five minutes, that is, the most beautiful picture in the-

"Do you have the answer to the question yet?" Isabella inquired.

"Yes," I responded. "I think." In retrospect, I should have stuck to the one-word answer.

"And what would that be?" Isabella asked.

This was, of course, the time my mouth had no words supplied. I tried and failed to make a sound.

"Phineas, the fact that you aren't responding isn't helping!" Isabella exclaimed.

"I, uh," I started. Why did she have to gouge these moments?

"Phineas, is your brain broken or something?" she asked.

I nodded his head haphazardly.

"Phineas," Isabella beckoned. "Phineas!"

"What?! Oh, sorry," I apologized. I could almost taste her lips from there. All the while, I thought about how she wasn't joyful. My heart was beating really fast. I felt something moving inside of me. But something wasn't happening, that should have.

"Fine, if that's how you want to be," Isabella muttered.

I got up immediately. "Wait! Isabella!"

"What?" Isabella murmured frustrated.

Words refused to come, again. It was like she had magic powers.

"Never mind," Isabella muttered as she lay down in the grass unhappily.

I lay down a foot away. I felt uneasy doing so, as if it wasn't my place. She wasn't in a good mood.

Isabella placed her left hand in my right. It soothed me.

"Look at that cloud," Isabella motioned.

"It looks like a, raindrop?" I wondered.

"Hmm, I guess you could say that," Isabella agreed.

"What about that one, right next to us?" I asked.

"It looks like a warhead exploding on thin air," Isabella responded.

"Cumulonimbus," I muttered. Now that is a storm cloud.

"What?" Isabella asked. Suddenly, rain procured all over us. It was if the heavens had a leak. We both got up immediately. We ran to the screen door.

Ferb stuck his tongue out from behind the glass. Why? Couldn't he just let us in? He is so difficult sometimes.

I led us to the front door, where the eve shielded them from the rain. I didn't have to try the door to know Ferb locked it.

"Isabella, are you okay?" I inquired.

"I'm fine," she replied.

"Sorry, I just, I worry about you," I responded. "I don't ever want to lose you. I made a PowerPoint presentation on that."

"Ookay," Isabella responded. That was when I realized something was wrong.

"What? Did I say something wrong?" I asked, fear flying in my face.

Isabella face palmed and turned around. I wasn't fully comprehending how bad this was.

"Isabella! You aren't leaving, are you?" I asked, full of fear. "I know why you care about my destiny!"

"It doesn't even matter anymore," Isabella responded. "You know why?"

I shook my head in utter discontent. I wanted to grab her and not let go.

"I don't care about your destiny anymore. Heck, I don't even care about you, period," Isabella turned.

"What? No! But I wanted to be your boyfriend, and husband, and, I thought that was the reason you cared about my destiny," I cried. I felt like part of me was cracking.

"It was; I don't know what possessed me, but I am so over you!" Isabella shouted.

"NO! PLEASE! I'LL DO ANYTHING FOR JUST ONE MORE DAY!" I screamed. Anguish flew through my blood stream.

Isabella turned her back on me.

"DON'T LEAVE ME ALL BY MYSELF! Please," I cried. "I can't live without you." I stood in her way to leave. This couldn't be the end.

"Let me go!" Isabella shouted.

"Not if you don't swear that you'll come back," I responded. I got a little comfort from my own words. She tried to run past me, but I tackled her in a hug. When I heard her heartbeat, I felt that much worse. But I couldn't let go. Then, eventually, she broke out of the hug and left. I found myself staring at where she was, hoping that the space time continuum would have some random hiccup. Then I heard her shut the door, as she entered her house. She just shut the door.

I stood still as the sky rained down gallons of water upon me. My eyes were raining too, more than they ever had before. Maybe if I stayed right there, in the moment, Isabella wouldn't seem far. I put my hands out, both palms up, and watched the rain hit my fingers. I realized that was a stupid thought. My hands started shaking. I just lost. I just lost everything important to me. "Why, God, why?!" I screamed. Lightning struck in the distance. The crack of thunder didn't make me feel any better. It can be called coincidence, but that timing was something else. If God was against me, how could I stand? I cowered back. I knocked on the front door, Ferb opened it. "Thanks for ruining my life," I retorted.

Ferb looked shocked.

"Thanks to your little prank, Isabella left and she isn't coming back, ever," I informed.

"Wait, seriously? I'm sorry," Ferb apologized.

"The damage is already done," I muttered as tears travelled down my face like weary travellers.

Ferb gave me a hug.

I cried into my brother's shoulder; I wasn't really mad at him. I knew it wasn't his fault. Then I left for my room. Looking back on all we did together, I felt like there was a problem that made me want to cry. It was slow poisoning, like mercury, but it had seeped into all of my friends, even Ferb. We used to laugh, we used to laugh. Buford decided he was too cool to build, and Ferb too. Isabella was gone, and Baljeet- I don't know. Remembering what she said was like looking at bullet holes in my chest. I couldn't stand, couldn't stop myself from remembering the musical sound of her voice when she greeted me this morning. Why does everyone subscribe to this madness?! I guess I'll just go on like nothing happened. I hope that works. My countenance denies it.

 **This chapter is meant to be a little more in depth. :'( Sad. What a corrupted Danville society. I honestly can't believe how fast I wrote this. I am stoked on that! =D**


	17. Inside the First Day Of School

I woke. "Phineas! It is the first day of school! I don't want you to miss the bus!" she shouted. I scrambled up quickly, got dressed, grabbed my backpack, and rushed to the door. I saw the bus was there, and Ferb was getting on. I had come not a moment too soon. I boarded the bus, and looked for an empty seat. I found one next to Isabella. She looked over at me. "Hi, Isabella," I started. I felt like I shouldn't have sat there. "Isabella, I'm sorry," Phineas muttered. "For what? Sitting on the bus next to me?" Isabella responded. "No, I'm sorry I ever came into your life," I muttered. Did I really have to gouge myself again? I covered my face. This was embarrassing. "Well, I have mixed feelings about it," she responded. "Why?" I asked. I felt like my open wound was being hurt by the air.

"Well, it is better to try and fail than never try at all, right?" she muttered.

"How did you fail?" I asked her.

"Why I failed, I-" she started.

"How, not why," I corrected.

Isabella grew quiet.

"And what did you try for? Us?" I continued. "You don't have to fail." I felt in my heart otherwise, but I knew I needed to put on a fake smile for everyone else.

"I didn't fail," Isabella stated. "You failed." Ouch.

"Forgive me," I repented. I felt like something was really lacking here.

"For sitting next to me?" Isabella inquired.

"Yes, but I was not talking about that," I stated. Then I paused. "Forgive me for whatever you left me for."

"No," Isabella denied. Well, that was just a great deadpan.

"Why?" I countered.

"Figure it out yourself," she enunciated curtly.

"Isabella, we've been down this road before," I responded. I realized just how foreign my tone was. I decided to ignore my own verbal mistake. But I knew I had heard that tone before.

"Yep, the bus always goes down this one," she stated.

"You know, that's not what I meant," I stated back.

Then the bus unloaded. All of the students went in to the cafeteria, where they would wait to be led to the corresponding classroom. "Isabella," I muttered. She ignored me. I glimpsed Ferb talking and laughing with some unfamiliar kids. I idled for what felt like a second. They were lining up now. Before I knew it, we were in our homeroom. My teacher was named Heinz Doofenshmirtz. "Welcome to Evil- I mean perfectly good Science!" Heinz sputtered. He seemed a little weird. "Take a seat anywhere. These seating positions aren't set in stone, so bear with me."

I sat to the right of Isabella.

"I have a really cool way to learn all of your names," Heinz started.

"To start, boy in the blue striped shirt, hand out these popsicle sticks. Each person gets one. You write your full name on it, and no funny business, or else. I am pairing you with a random classmate for our first science project."

Soon, all of the popsicle sticks were filled out and in the can.

"Froyo Davis, please stand," Heinz instructed. "Wow, Froyo is your real name? Your parents must have hated you."

Froyo looked unsettled, to say the least.

"Ignacio Fernando, please stand," Heinz requested. "You two will be lab partners for our first project."

I noticed that Heinz had written their names next to their faces.

"Baljeet Tjinder, please stand," Heinz requested. "Okay, you don't have to give me the zombie look."

"Ferb Fletcher, please stand," Heinz instructed. "You and Baljeet will be lab partners for our first project."

"Gretchen Brown, please stand," Heinz requested.

"Hans Chapman, please stand," Heinz instructed. "You two will be lab partners for our first project."

"Ginger Hirano, please stand," Heinz requested.

"Fiona Helen Gruber, please stand," Heinz requested. "You two will be lab partners for our first project as well."

"Isabella Garcia-Shapiro, please stand," Heinz continued.

"Phineas Flynn, please stand," Heinz requested. "You two will be lab partners for our first project too. Blah, I have said that too many times." Now that is a funny coincidence.

 **Muwahaha. :-þ**

Heinz Doofenshmirtz continued to pair people up. "Okay, now that everyone is paired up, let's get started. People who don't finish this in class will have to contact their classmate and do it for homework," Heinz stated. "I have a questionnaire for all of you to fill out," Heinz explained. Ten minutes passed, until everyone had finished filling out the questionnaire. "Come get your instructions for our Bunsen burner activity. I have just enough to give out one per pair of you and have a spare. You know my e-mail is on the board: hdoofenshmirtz . I can send you a virtual copy if you lose yours. All right, does every pair have a set of instructions? Good. You may now start. The equipment is set up on the tables thanks to Mr. Schlapp. If you can't finish this in class, I hope you have a Bunsen burner at home," Heinz stated. The class got to work immediately. Then Ferb spoke up. "Um, Dr. Doofenshmirtz, where is the fuel?" Ferb inquired. I had been wondering the same thing. "Mr. Schlapp!" Heinz called. Then Norm appeared with a magnetic pin on which was written "Mr. Schlapp". "Please, put the fuel in each of these. I thought you had already done this," Heinz instructed. Norm Schlapp proceeded to put the fuel into each of the Bunsen burners. "Not too much! Goodness, Norm, I thought you were going to pour that stuff everywhere!" Heinz shouted. "Here, just let me do it! Wouldn't want to burn down the place, now would we?" So Heinz proceeded to do this himself. By the time he finished, it was the end of the period. "Yeah, sorry guys; we'll do this tomorrow. Remember your partners, and I'll give you extra credit if you fill out the worksheet with your partner before tomorrow morning. Just use your own Bunsen burners. Take a vial of each of the two unknown substances, and see if you can identify them. For your exit ticket, I am going to ask you all a question. Off the top of your heads, what do you think these substances are?" Heinz asked. Silence ensued. "Speak up!" Heinz beckoned impatiently. "Water?" Buford guessed. "Does water produce an odor when you heat it?" Heinz asked back. "You can leave now. Stop! Just the kid in the black skull shirt can leave. The rest of you have not answered my question yet. That is how an exit ticket works." "Is one hydrogen peroxide and the other isopropyl alcohol?" Ferb asked. "The other kid was closer," Heinz responded. Then Ferb left to go to break as Buford did. Soon, it was just me and Isabella, again. I gestured for her to go, but she was apparently in another world. She totally heard none of the conversation between Heinz and I. "The solutions, I could only guess to be pure elements heavily diluted in water," I guessed.

"Wow, you actually guessed it! But what elements? That is the question," Heinz responded. What else would I have expected?

"I have no idea; well, probably not technetium..." I answered. They we both burst into laughter. "So this one's your girlfriend?" Heinz asked. "I wish," I answered. But for some reason, that seemed false. But I did! I just...

"Oh! I'm so sorry!" Heinz exclaimed. "This is awkward."

"It isn't really a secret," I responded. "You are supposed to be in your next class in two minutes; I advise you make a good impression on your next teacher," Heinz advised. "Isabella!" I called. "Woah!" Isabella exclaimed. "What are these two solutions?" Heinz asked. "Sugar water and antifreeze?" Isabella guessed. "No, but your next class starts in T-1 minute, so I suggest you get a move on," Heinz stated. "Oh!" Isabella exclaimed. She darted off and I power walked close behind her. We got into the line just in time. Soon we were led off to Mrs. Weaver's class. This was English Language Arts class. "All right, class, come here to get your essay prompt!" Mrs. Weaver exclaimed. "Sit somewhere, and there will be no food in this classroom! You have until the end of class to get this and one other thing done. Come see me when you have finished writing your essay." We all wrote our essays in silence. How did my summer go? "It sucked," I wrote. I continued to write. Soon we were on to the next class. This was Mr. Francis Monogram's classroom. "Welcome to history class! I am Mr. Monogram," Francis greeted. "We will be starting with ancient texts, like Hammurabi's code, Gilgamesh, and, of course, the Bible. Open your history books up to page twelve," Monogram instructed. And as Monogram blabbed on about the importance of these ancient texts, each student opened the textbooks set out for them. That class was like thick syrup, but it was better than the one just before it. After that class passed, it was time for lunch.

We all went out to the cafeteria to eat. Those who brought home lunches sat down at a table and the others waited in line; I and Isabella both fit into the former group. Isabella glared at me when I sat next to her. "Why?" she interrogated. "Because we need to talk," I answered.

"What do you want?!" Isabella asked in an annoyed tone.

"I think I just told you," I responded.

"I don't want to talk to you! Go away!" she shouted. Then she moved away. I should have seen that coming, but I totally didn't.

The rest of school wasn't even noteworthy. At the end of the day, I got in the bus and headed home. I went in and got a Bunsen burner and fuel from the house and took the two vials, not to mention a cart to carry it all on. "Mom, I am going to Isabella's for a science project," I explained.

"Okay," Linda accepted; she was very focused on her knitting stuff.

Then I went outside, across the street, and knocked on Isabella's door. "Hello," I greeted.

"Phineas, why are- Oh, that's right," Isabella responded. "That stupid science teacher!"

"You want to come to my house and-" I started.

"Let's just get this over with," Isabella responded as she rushed past me and went to the sidewalk. Time stopped again, but for a very different reason. I ran after her and grabbed her arm forcefully as a car sped by at over ninety miles per hour, in their neighborhood. Isabella's started almost hyperventilating.

"Please, don't ever do that again," I scolded.

"Let's go," Isabella prompted. I followed her across the street, still alarmed. Soon, we had set up the Bunsen burner in the basement, with ample space, and had put the first vial in. "Should I take the cork out?" Isabella asked.

"I think so," I responded. So she did so. I put my nose up to the top of the vial and Isabella did the same, not realizing I was right there. The awkwardness escalated when our noses touched. I felt like had to kill the weirdness. "It's chlorine," I stated in a mutter. "What? WHAT JUST HAPPENED? Oh, my, oh," l thought. Why were Isabella's lips on mine? I thought she hated me. This was so amazing. I felt woozy and dizzy. Eventually we had to break apart, gasping for air. "Isabella!" I blabbed. My heart was pounding in my chest like a metronome or a jackhammer. "Could we, could we, could we do that again?" I begged. To my delight, she did not hesitate. I noticed that she had lip gloss on. It tasted like that one fruit I never remember. I hadn't been that content since that summer long ago. "Isabella, why did you kiss me?" I blabbed.

"Because I love you, Phineas, even if you hurt me on accident," Isabella comforted.

"I am truly sorry. Can I make it up to you?" I responded. But something didn't seem right. It was like I was reading from a script.

"What?" Isabella responded. "What did you say?" She seemed really embarrassed and, scared?

"Can I make it up to you?" I repeated.

"Oh," Isabella responded in relief.

"What else would I have said?" I wondered confusedly.

"Never mind," Isabella peeped.

"What was this element, again?" I inquired. "Why is my memory so bad all of a sudden?" Truth be told, I could only focus on three things: The first kiss, the second kiss, and why I still felt like I had a void to fill.

 **What do you think of this POV? I'm switching back to third-person next chapter, and will probably stick with it for at least a little while. Tell me, what do you think? The review box is below. ( :-þ )**


	18. The Second Day Of School

Phineas woke to a new day. He thought about the day before and reflected upon that one first kiss. He was glad that Isabella had agreed to being his girlfriend. He didn't think his relationship with her was ever going to come back, but it did so just like a magic trick. He got dressed and combed his hair, even though it wasn't much. Soon, he was off with Ferb. He sat next to Isabella on the bus, who didn't seem riled. She was looking out the window, very indecisively. "Isabella," Phineas greeted.

She said nothing in response.

"What changed your mind?" he asked.

She had no answer for him.

"Isabella?" Phineas prompted.

"Uh huh?" she responded.

"I wanted to say that I'm sorry if I have been a jerk lately," Phineas apologized.

"What do you mean?" Isabella asked.

"I mean, I am sorry about the whole last day of summer thing," Phineas apologized.

"It doesn't matter anyway, right? It's part of the past," she stated.

Phineas had to disagree. "No," Phineas responded. "It isn't just part of the past. I made you mad. I'm sorry," Phineas apologized again.

"It's all right!" Isabella responded.

"Then why do I still feel bad about it?" Phineas asked.

"I dunno," Isabella responded. "Think about it."

Phineas was silent. He realized why, but was too afraid to mention it. "So, which one of our teachers is your least favorite?" Phineas inquired.

"Mrs. Weaver, hands down," Isabella replied.

"You know she lives in the house next to ours?" Phineas responded.

"Ours?" Isabella asked confusedly.

"Mine and Ferb's," Phineas explained. "Isn't he sitting on the other end of the bus?" Isabella responded.

Phineas sighed. "Yes," he admitted.

"Why don't you talk to him?" Isabella suggested.

"I'll do it at lunch," Phineas responded.

"Are you sure he'll-" Isabella started. The bus stopped abruptly. Fifteen minutes later, the class walked into their homeroom.

"Good morning, class!" Heinz greeted. "Turn in your Bunsen burner thingies, what's the word? Anyway, take a seat, we are going to get a little more in-depth in the elements. Now, tell me, Ba- ba- ba- Baltimore, what are the two substances?" Heinz asked. "It's Balthazar," Balthazar corrected. "Balm czar?" Heinz failed. "Balthazar! Sheesh, we all took he time to nail the name Doofenshmirfz," Balthazar mumbled.

"So, Balthmazar, tell me, what are the two substances?" Heinz prodded.

Balthazar face palmed. "Sulfur and chlorine," he mumbled.

"Are we all in agreement?" Heinz asked the class.

No one responded.

"Okay, I'm going to have to start-" Heinz started.

"We're in agreement," Buford announced.

"Don't interrupt the teacher, please, although I understand," Heinz responded. "At least it's better than not speaking when you're supposed to. Anyway, that was an introduction to chemistry. Sulfur has 16 protons and chlorine has 17. Now, you may be asking 'Why should I care?' You should because if it wasn't for chlorine's specific properties due to its electron count, which varies directly with a ratio of 1:1 to proton count, we wouldn't have salt, and we'd all be dead because of that."

"Wat's 'da proton count gotta do wit' 'da electron count?" Baljeet responded. He used to know this.

Heinz face palmed while the rest of the class broke into laughter.

"Haha, nerd!" Buford exclaimed. "He doesn't even know what the nerd says. What does the nerd say? Ring-ding-ding-da-ding-da-ding-ding!" Buford sang.

Half of the class started singing it too, and Pedro covered his ears and made a face.

"Class!" Heinz bellowed. "I know we all love music, but that song does not have to do with science at all! Let me put on the cell rap," Heinz started.

"What about the assignment?" Irving responded.

"Oh, yeah, um, we are now going to study carbon, before touching on genetics, which hopefully won't end up turning anyone into some freaky monkey lizard thing," Heinz explained. There was an awkward silence. "It's happened before," Heinz stated.

"Hmm, good to know," Ferb muttered sarcastically.

"Thank you," Heinz responded. "Now, can anyone tell me what in this room is made of carbon? Now, take notes on this, because I am going to grade them."

Irving raised his hand. "We are made of carbon?" Irving guessed with confidence.

"Primarily yes. That is exactly what I was looking for. Anything else?" Heinz asked.

"Poop?" Buford guessed. "We call it excrement in the classroom, Buford, and raise your hand next time, but yes, primarily. Anything else?"

Fiona raised her hand. "There is excrement in the classroom?!" Fiona exclaimed.

"Inside our bodies, yes, unless all you've been eating is Jello for four weeks, yes," Heinz responded.

Phineas paled.

"Anything else?" Heinz tested. "Maybe your pencil leads, that are technically graphite, pure carbon?"

"Oh," the class responded.

"Now when you go home, look for things that have carbon in them that we haven't talked about yet. Now don't blurt anymore out, because I want you to find five on your own, and you can't use one you say in class," Heinz explained. "Fill out this worksheet and answer my question when you're done for the exit ticket."

So they did. Mrs. Weaver's class was lame, as usual. Monogram taught them about the birth of Isaac. The monotony of school usually weighed on Phineas' heart, but he felt a little bit better today. Soon enough, it was lunch. "Should we knock out our reading templates first, or just eat and talk?" Phineas asked.

"We can do all of the above," Isabella suggested.

"Okay," Phineas responded. "What is the birth of Isaac about?"

"Oh, goodness, that's a hard one," Isabella responded sarcastically. "Maybe, perhaps, the birth of Isaac?"

"Of course! But what besides that?" Phineas asked.

"Uh, I dunno," Isabella muttered.

"Seriously? He read it to us aloud? How do you forget that?" Phineas inquired.

"But his voice is so monotone and melodic, and the room is so boring!" Isabella defended.

"You fell asleep?" Phineas asked.

"Yeah, sorry," Isabella responded.

"No worries. You have a Bible at home, right?" Phineas checked.

"No," Isabella denied.

"Well, then, I guess you need to buy one," Phineas concluded.

"Wait, weren't you supposed to talk to Ferb?" Isabella asked.

"Ferb!" Phineas called. Ferb ignored him, and the bell rang, so the kids got in line and marched away.

Then they went on to Mrs. What's-Her-Face's physical education class. Her true last name was more than forty letters long. "Alright, today we're gonna do fifteen laps around the building in four minutes! That's sixteen seconds a lap! Those who fail will do a hundred exercises of one of the two exercises I choose. Gather now! On your marks! Get set! Stop! I didn't give you a water bottle break yet, did I? You got fifteen seconds starting now!" Mrs. What's-Her-Face exclaimed.

Everyone scrambled for their water bottles.

"Group up!" Mrs. What's-Her-Face shouted.

Everyone took their positions.

"On your marks! Get set! GO! Go! Go! Go!" Mrs. What's-Her-Face bellowed.

Phineas, Baljeet, and Fiona among others got trampled by the stampede.

Phineas' face smacked upon the hard asphalt.

Baljeet's head responded with a thud.

Fiona wailed as her bosom was nearly flattened by the harsh fall, and her elbow seeped red.

Django was the first to get up.

Then Baljeet straightened up, albeit in a very unnatural way.

Phineas got up, and held out his hand to Fiona.

"Hey! She can get up by herself!" Mrs. What's-Her-Face chided.

"This is physical education class, not How To Throw Someone Under The Bus class!" Phineas retorted.

The ghastly pun shut the normally bossy woman up.

He sped off as soon as she was up, and she almost met his pace, which was a good sign.

Ten seconds later, Danny was already finished with his first lap, with Holly tailing.

Mrs. What's-Her-Face operated her stopwatch while sitting on a lawn chair.

Soon, they were all finished.

"Okay, I know I said four minutes, but I meant fifteen. Sorry! They both start with 'f'. I am really bad with that letter," Mrs. What's-Her-Face explained. "Phineas, Isabella, Fiona, Baljeet, and Pedro, you will be doing a hundred push-ups or a hundred sit-ups. Choose?" Mrs. What's-Her-Face prompted.

They all chose push-ups. They knew better than to do sit-ups, because Mrs. What's-Her-Face was super finicky about them. Soon, they were done.

When school let out, Phineas ended up sitting next to Isabella, and across from Fiona, and neither Phineas nor Fiona had a window seat. Phineas and Fiona ended up talking while Isabella stayed silent. She was obviously as pooped as a well-worn horse.

"Thanks for standing up for me," Fiona thanked.

"No problem," Phineas responded. "So where do you live?"

"Oh, Chestnut Rd.," Fiona explained.

"Oh, that intersects Maple Drive, right?" Phineas inquired.

"Yeah, why?" Fiona wondered.

"I live on Maple Drive and so does Isabella, my girlfriend," Phineas informed.

"Oh, cool!" Fiona exclaimed.

"Isabella? Isabella! Wow, she is out," Phineas noted.

"So what do you do for fun?" Fiona inquired.

"I used to have a great hobby, now I'm looking for one to replace it," Phineas explained.

"Well, there are all sorts of sports, from croquet to football, and there is enough good literature out there to appease even the most critical, there are virtual things, from game design to trying for a high score in a simple video game to animation, there is study of all types, which I know many find entertaining, there is construction, gardening, driving, cooking, auto repair, if that's your thing, which I'm guessing it isn't, board games, card games, even cleaning and organizing, and that's just off the top of my head," Fiona stated. She looked up to see Phineas scribbling seemingly maniacally on a notebook.

"Thanks, you just inspired me to make a list," Phineas muttered, in a tone that told he was deep in thought. "Hmm, I guess I have done most of these, but some of these take multiple lifetimes to fully tackle. My old one was construction, by the way."

"What do you build?" Fiona inquired.

"I used to think I built great things, but no one likes my ideas," Phineas explained.

"Well, conjure a new idea for me," Fiona prompted.

"A giant atomic clock," Phineas blurted.

"Sounds good. Develop it," Fiona suggested.

"A giant atomic clock made with cesium and with a complex alarm system that can anticipate the minute and send the signal with delays accounted for so that it blares on the yoctosecond!" Phineas exclaimed.

"There you go! Wait, wouldn't that kind of thing wake the whole town, though?" Fiona asked.

"I could dumb down the sound system," Phineas stated.

"That would fix the problem. See, you think that's a good idea, right?" Fiona prompted.

"Yeah," Phineas answered. "I guess I just haven't tried to get a good idea in a while."

The bus stopped at Fiona's house. "See you tomorrow," Fiona finished. Then she got out of the bus.

The bus drove over to Maple Drive. "Isabella, wake up," Phineas muttered. He had to poke her under the ear to get her to wake. "Let's go," Phineas beckoned. They got out of the bus and onto the street. "Isabella, can you come over? I have a new invention idea," Phineas explained.

"Please, don't enlighten me," Isabella responded. "I have a dentist appointment in four hours, and I need to brush and floss for at least five to make up for lost time."

"Oh, okay," Phineas muttered.

Isabella gave him a small kiss and went across the street and went inside.

Phineas touched his cheek absentmindedly and went inside where Ferb and Candace were.

"Phineas, we need to have a little talk," Ferb stated in a stern, steady tone.

"Can it wait?" Phineas muttered. "I need to make a blueprint."

"Seriously, another baby-headed scheme? You're worse than Candace with her Ducky Momo, a.k.a. pus and poo poo!" Ferb badmouthed.

"Hey!" Candace shouted from her room.

"We need to talk now," Ferb stated.

Phineas followed Ferb into their room.

"Listen very carefully; I don't want to have to tell you twice," Ferb stated.

Phineas leaned forward slightly.

"I do not want to be seen with you in public," Ferb stated, saying one word every four seconds. Then Ferb punched Phineas' big nose.

Phineas cried out in pain.

"If you do so much as say something to me when I am with Vanessa, so much as associate with me in front of her, I will tear your nose off!" Ferb shouted.

Phineas shook under his step brother's intense stare.

Then Ferb sucker punched him in the gut.

Phineas fell back onto the floor.

"Gonna fight back? Huh?" Ferb riled.

"I can't fight you, Ferb," a teary eyed Phineas stated. "Why can't we just go back to old times?"

"Two reasons. One, I am trying to court someone who means the world to me, and I cannot let anything get in the way of that," Ferb stated in a harsh voice.

"And the second?" Phineas asked.

Ferb's posture and facial expression softened. His lips curved into an undeniable frown and he spoke. "I don't really like to think about the second one."

Phineas got back up. "That's the big one, isn't it?" Phineas tested.

"Not necessarily," a temporarily content Ferb answered. "The first one is almost as big as the second."

"So they aren't very big?" Phineas inquired. That was not the best thing to say.

Ferb kicked Phineas hard on the shin. "I HAVE HAD IT WITH YOU!" Ferb screamed. Then Ferb kneed Phineas in the chest.

"Ow!" Phineas wailed.

Ferb went into all out attack mode as his step brother struggled to spare himself to the maximum.

Fifteen minutes later, a sobbing Phineas was lying on the ground with one less baby tooth. It was astounding that he still had a baby tooth to lose, given his age. He had bruises everywhere and a bloody nose.

Ferb had to leave after that; the guilt was biting at his soul.

Phineas dragged himself onto his bed and fell asleep amidst the pain to have dreams.

· · ·

Phineas woke to Perry in his arms and the Giant Floating Baby Head with Irving in his room.

"Phineas, your mission is to retrieve the lost coaster," Irving explained. He pulled up a holographic screen that depicted Linda realizing she lost a coaster and grieving on the ground.

"That's horrible!" Phineas exclaimed.

"Go on, take your Perry and make this happen!" Irving instructed. "You should start at Isabella's house."

"Okay," Phineas accepted. He went outside and ran across the street. Then he saw an unfamiliar boy standing in front of Isabella's house. Phineas tried to rush past him.

"A troubled girl lives inside that house," the boy warned.

"I've known her since I was as short and cute as a stump," Phineas responded.

"No you don't," the boy warned.

Phineas nearly dropped Perry when he saw the cigarette butts at the boy's feet. "Excuse me, but I need you to get out of my way," Phineas stated.

"No," the boy stated firmly.

Phineas weaved himself through the boy and reached the door. He opened the door to be saluted by some sort of pollution in the inside air. Phineas coughed and Perry chartered angrily.

Then Perry marched into the house.

Phineas felt he should bring the boy in. "Are you comin'?" Phineas prompted.

"It won't last forever," the boy stated.

"Follow if you please," Phineas instructed. He was not followed. He saw bare walls, and he was distraught. Vivian always had paintings up on her walls. He tiptoed over to the staircase. As he ascended, he heard new creaking. He knew something was really wrong. Maybe someone was missing more than one coaster. He was determined to find them all. He walked up to Isabella's door and knocked. Then he opened the door. He found her resting on her bed with a glass of water and a pack of cigarettes on her bedstand. "Isabella?" Phineas called.

"Yes," Isabella responded.

"Why are there cigarettes on your bedstand?" Phineas inquired.

Isabella responded by a long, grueling cough.

"Isabella!" Phineas cried. "No!" He sat her up and held her tightly to feel her abnormal lung patterns against his chest. He didn't know when his tears arrived, but he guessed it was before he entered the room. He kissed her hard, but it was dry and stale. He felt like smoke had entered his own lungs. He stepped back in horror, tears screaming on his face.

She held that coaster out to him, but he threw it up and over behind his head and it shattered when it hit the wall.

He grabbed her hand to stop the madness.

Then Perry crawled onto Phineas' lap.

Her cold hand froze his fingers. "When was the last time you ate?" Phineas asked.

Isabella's frown told him the worst.

Phineas panicked. He checked his pockets desperately and found a granola bar. He gave it to her, begging her to try to eat it.

She ate it horribly slowly, and Phineas couldn't stand the wait.

"Why did you eat it slowly?" Phineas asked.

"I can't eat faster than that!" Isabella cried.

Perry disintegrated off of Phineas' lap.

"It's fine! It's fine!" Phineas responded hastily. He was shaken by Perry's disappearance. He sat next to her. "You wanna build something?" Phineas suggested. Then he was interrupted.

· · ·

Phineas woke up to no Perry. He was frankly freaked out about the dream. He looked at the clock in a stiff movement.

 **This took ridiculously long to write. Was that just a dream or foreshadowing? We'll have to see. Review what you think! :-)**


	19. Vanessa's Third Day Of School

Vanessa woke up.

"Good morning, honey bun. Let's get ready now, so we can make it there early," her father instructed warmly.

Vanessa sighed and opened her phone. She usually tried to scold her dad, but she did I not that day. She was completely oblivious to how quickly she transitioned from knowing Ferb to giving him her phone number to texting him first thing after she woke. "Hi Ferb" she texted.

"Good morning, Vanessa." Ferb texted back almost too promptly.

"Brb I need to get ready" Vanessa texted haphazardly as she got up out of bed and got dressed.

"K" Ferb texted immediately.

Vanessa thought, amused, about how Ferb spelled out the good morning greeting but didn't spell out the word "okay" as she ate her breakfast and made her lunch. "Intriguing," Vanessa thought as she pulled the spinach out of the fridge. Her hands moved quickly and deliberately. Soon, her lunch was finished. Then she realized she hadn't eaten breakfast yet. She smacked herself in the face. "What is wrong with me?" Vanessa asked herself. She got out the honey cereal and the soymilk. She opened the cupboard hastily and got herself a bowl. She went into the silverware drawer and obtained a long, slender vanadium steel utensil that was called a spoon. She threw it all together in a beautiful hodgepodge. She remembered the missing ingredient that moment. She opened the fridge and came out smiling with the package of raspberries in her hands. She placed a couple in her cereal randomly, like acorns in a park. Then her hand grasped the vanadium steel as she slurped up a spoonful of mostly milk. She suddenly quickened her pace as soon as she saw the time. She felt like her mind was blurred as she absentmindedly finished getting ready. She was soon in the back of her dad's car that was bought by alimony checks from her mother. She used to not be okay with this, but she knew her father knew not to go out and try to meet her friends, because that would make her look really bad, and tarnish her reputation. She had made it clear to him that he was not to interact with any of her friends unless prompted, and if so, minimally. She pulled out her phone and realized it was low battery, much to her dismay. She thought she had charged it last night. Then she remembered the plug hadn't been connected to the wall. She wanted to cry and scream at the same time. She did everything on her phone. She leaned back and grabbed the car door with her right hand and the side of her seat with her left. She took in a couple deep breaths. "Is something wrong?" Heinz asked her.

"I'm fine, Dad," Vanessa responded disappointedly.

"Something has you upset. Do tell," Heinz prompted.

"My phone is almost dead!" Vanessa exclaimed. "Now quiet!"

"Honey, I have a phone charger right here," Heinz explained. He motioned to the center console.

Vanessa opened it to find a standard phone charger. "Aw, come on, Dad! You know my phone only takes that special kind!"

"Oh, sorry honey. That is all I have," Heinz stated.

"Come on! Haven't we had this exact situation before?!" Vanessa shouted with anger.

"Um," Heinz blabbed.

Vanessa sighed in frustration. "It's okay, Dad. Just drive to school," she instructed in a self consoling voice.

"Sure thing, dear," Heinz responded.

Soon they arrived. Vanessa hated her physical education teacher. It was Mrs. What's-Her-Face.

"Alright, class! Let's do some jumping jacks!" Mrs. What's-Her-Face exclaimed.

Vanessa followed along unhappily. Soon she was on to F. Monogram's class. She did not enjoy learning about the Sumerians at all. She ended up falling asleep.

Then on to Mrs. Weaver's class she went. She ended up writing a two page essay. Apparently Mrs. Weaver loved essays.

Then she went to lunch. She sat next to Ferb, Danny, Cecil, Dana, and others.

"Good noon!" Ferb greeted.

Vanessa giggled lightly. "Why doesn't anyone ever say that?"

"Noon is a pretty small part of day," Ferb explained.

"Ah, yes," Vanessa responded.

"Are you alright? You seem tense," Ferb noted.

"I just never feel at ease when my phone is dead," Vanessa admitted.

"We could charge it over lunch," Ferb suggested.

"Okay, sure. Wait, my phone only takes a certain type of charger!" Vanessa exclaimed semi-quietly. Vanessa looked over to see Ferb holding that specific type of charger.

"Wait, how do you have the exactly right one?" Vanessa inquired, baffled.

"That is just the kind my phone takes," Ferb answered.

"Weird," Vanessa commented. She plugged it in without any teacher noticing. "Anyway, what kind of phone do you have?"

Ferb showed her.

"Oh, so our phones are exactly the same?" Vanessa guessed.

Ferb motioned to their cases.

"Oh, yeah, different color. I remember the day my mom got me this phone. That was a bad day, but hilarious in retrospect," Vanessa explained. "I slipped on oil, ran headfirst into a large man, don't ask me how I knew he was a fruit fan, and I finished my all-time favorite book series. That morning, a fly got in my coffee, and that night, I dislocated my ankle after tripping over a, um, a chair. Yeah, chair."

"Ouch," Ferb responded. "So, how did you know the man was a fruit fan?"

"Don't ask!" Vanessa shouted.

Ferb just cracked up.

"Hey!" Vanessa shouted through her laughter.

As Ferb and Vanessa were chatting, Danny went up to Cecil's ear. "Cece, see a couple there?" Danny wondered.

"A mile away," Cecil responded.

Meanwhile, Ferb and Vanessa were gasping for air after their laughing fit that brought maybe a little too much attention to themselves.

"Fruit of the loom?" Ferb inquired.

Vanessa just shook her head. "He was holding a banana."

They burst into laughter.

"Why are we even talking about this?" Vanessa asked herself. Even though she was in the moment, she knew something was off with her. Like, she needed to take inventory.

"Yellow or green?" Ferb asked.

"Why?" Vanessa asked incredulously.

"I don't know. Weren't we talking about something really important a minute ago?" Ferb inquired.

"Um, let's see, banana, homeless man, oh, yeah! I finished the _Perfect Summer_ series, which is pretty self-explanatory, except it ends tragic," Vanessa explained.

"How so?" Ferb wondered.

"The summer ends, and their lives go to ****," Vanessa explained.

Something clicked in Ferb's head.

"That's sad," Ferb responded. "How so?"

"They have a legendary summer, but after it, the group disintegrates. Life at the top is addictive, and you can only be there once. Once you fall from glory, it isn't ever the same," Vanessa explained.

Ferb tried his best to act like what she told him hadn't sincerely affected him.

Ferb noticed a new boy handing out- What? He had to have imagined that.

And lunch was over. Vanessa's phone charged to 20%.

In her father's class, Vanessa never agknowledged Heinz as her father. He was not the coolest guy.

While she was holding insect coxae with tweezers, she dozed off.

"Vanessa?" Lacey beckoned.

But Vanessa was so gone. Everyone watched with an awkward silence as Vanessa idled over the solution.

"You're supposed to put them in," Heinz explained.

Vanessa did not respond.

"Hello! Vanessa? This is your teacher speaking. Somebody get me a feather!" Heinz exclaimed.

A feather was provided and Heinz took it in his hands.

He stepped up with it, and rubbed it rapidly on Vanessa's face.

She dropped them in, causing the solution to make a sizzling sound.

"Whoa! What the-" Vanessa started.

Everyone burst into laughter.

"Da- Dr. Doofenshmirtz!" Vanessa exclaimed.

"Next time, stay in this dimension," Heinz advised. "So, as you see class..."

 **What was Vanessa thinking about? What am I thinking about? What are you thinking about? Why am I asking all of these questions? Why is light not made of atoms? Why are banana? o_O Okay, I need to stop. Review!**


	20. The Third Day Of School

Phineas woke up sweaty and miserable. Brushing his teeth proved quite the challenge after Phineas accidentally decapitated the toothbrush. He enjoyed bending them since his wee years, much to his mother's dismay. His bruises and sore spots only made it harder.

"Ferb, your stupid weight set is in my way!" Candace shouted.

"I'm texting Vanessa!" Ferb bellowed.

Candace scoffed and kicked one of the weights, only to fall on the ground in pain. "FERB!" Candace screamed at the top of her lungs. "Come here and help me up this INSTANT!"

"Can't you give it a rest?!" Ferb shouted.

"Some brother you are," Candace muttered.

But Ferb's keen ears heard. He realized it might be best to assess the situation. He payed much more attention to a muttering Candace than a yelling one, because the latter seemed to be her default. "Candace?" Ferb called. He saw Candace with eyes scrunched up and hands holding her foot tightly. "This isn't hard to move," Ferb explained, but he got distracted by his phone.

Candace gasped in surprise at this. She got up with a miffed expression and moved the weights. Her foot still hurt. Ferb did not seem to notice her groaning as she did what she had asked him to do, and FERB was the gentleman, and she would THINK that he would run over to do it for her politely, but NO. He was too busy texting some girl or some dude that Ferb apparently respected more than his stepsister.

Phineas, meanwhile, was assessing the new acne on his face. He pinched it, and recoiled in pain. He shook his head to refresh his face like one would an internet page. It didn't work.

As they walked out the door, Candace to her new job and Phineas and Ferb to school, Ferb bumped into Phineas, who almost fell over.

Phineas and Ferb boarded the bus.

Phineas sat next to Isabella, again.

Fiona, who was across from them, was intensely focused on her drawing.

"Good morning," Phineas greeted.

"Hi, Phineas," a distant Isabella responded.

"Are you okay?" Phineas asked.

"As usual," Isabella explained.

"Ah, okay," Phineas finished, satisfied with her answer.

"And done!" Fiona exclaimed.

"What?" Phineas exclaimed.

"I just finished my drawing," Fiona beckoned. Her cousin Balthazar was quietly sitting beside her. He did not look, because he had watched her draw it.

"Ooh, is that a treehouse?" Phineas inquired.

"Of sorts," Fiona answered. "It is a little abstract..."

"You could make that! Here, could I show you my blueprint?" Phineas beckoned.

"Sure!" Fiona confirmed.

"It is a giant art piece that has real functionality. We could put it in that empty lot next to the Googleplex Mall," Phineas suggested.

Now, Fiona was not prepared for what was on that blueprint. She thought he had probably been pretending or something, but these were complex, menacing blueprints.

"There's a spa?" Fiona gaped. "And why a giant toy truck, inside a giant alarm clock? Oh, that is for if little kids come, huh? Aw, that is so sweet that you would think of that."

Phineas blushed red, not because Fiona was doing things to his head, but because the toy truck was not meant for the little kids. It actually really hit him in the gut.

He wished Perry was there in his lap.

"Yeah, the alarm clock is going to be quite big," Phineas stated. "There will be a lot of stuff in it."

Isabella sat up straight. Was Phineas talking about building, again? "Huh?" she responded as she woke from her stagnant stupor.

"I'm planning on building a giant alarm clock this afternoon," Phineas explained. "Want to look at it?"

There was that giddy inventor smile that Isabella thought was responsible for her falling for him in the first place.

"Sure," Isabella answered. She peered on to the paper and perused it. "Remove the giant toy truck," she stated..

"Why?" Fiona inquired.

"It is just- so- kiddy," Isabella stated.

"Isn't that the point?" Fiona responded. "There is going to be something that little kids will enjoy, inside- a- giant- alarm- clock. You know what, Phineas? The more we talk about this, the more absurd it sounds."

Something clicked in Isabella's head.

This was the new girl Phineas was hanging out with? Is he building because of her? What does he think of her? Does she like like him?

Isabella decided to assume yes to all of the questions. She thought she was probably right on at least three of them, which turned to all of them.

"What's wrong with a giant alarm clock?" Phineas asked.

Fiona paused.

"It would probably get vandalized to a horrible extent," Fiona stated.

Isabella perked up. Fiona's answer showed that she had putten real thought into the matter, and that she had given a creative answer. Creativity, the word rang dissonant in Isabella's mind.

"I hadn't thought of that," Phineas admitted. "I could set up a defense system."

"Are you serious? I would hope that it would use nonlethal defense tactics," Fiona tried.

"I can mount something that shoots tranquilizer darts on top of cameras," Phineas countered.

"Ah, now that sounds interesting," Fiona stated. "Still, where would you get resources to do such a thing?"

"Oh, I have a supplier," Phineas stated.

"Seriously?" Balthazar tested.

"Yeah," Phineas responded.

"But it's a building," Fiona tried.

"Yes," Phineas confirmed.

"And you are a junior in high school," Fiona inquired.

"Yep," Phineas answered.

"Look, don't get me wrong, you have a wonderful blueprint, and it is really detailed, but how the heck are you going to build a life-sized building while being a junior in high school?" Fiona doubted.

"Well, I have all of my permits in order," Phineas validated.

"That's your answer? What about balancing a costly time-consuming construction endeavour with high school, having to pay through the nose for the construction of a giant building that isn't even going to be of huge significance?" Fiona wondered. "Not to mention, you are still technically not even an adult, so aren't you a little young for this type of thing?"

"I think I can do it in one afternoon," Phineas stated.

Fiona burst into laughter.

"Sure, and tomorrow, we're going to start a pineapple farm!" Fiona exclaimed.

Balthazar started to chuckle too.

"Hey! I have done this kind of thing before," Phineas responded.

"If you say so," Fiona stopped.

The bus stopped and the kids got out.

· · ·

"Class, turn in your five things with carbon in it in the hand-in bin," Heinz instructed.

The class did so.

"Alright, now genetics," Heinz stated. "When we look at DNA, we have three parts. Can anyone guess what they are?"

Silence echoed through the sphere of their shapeless answer.

"We have our deoxyribos sugars," Heinz started. "And?"

He waited a full fifteen seconds.

"And nitrogenous bases. And?" Heinz prompted.

He waited seventy seconds.

"And phosphate groups," Heinz finished. "And, I think I'll assign you all extra homework."

Everyone groaned.

"This isn't because you didn't get any of them, it is because you didn't guess. In this class, it is better to try and fail than to not try at all, in all safe situations," Heinz explained.

A boy raised his hand. Phineas looked over and gasped.

"Sir, are you not to introduce us?" the boy asked in a perfect British accent. This was the boy in his dream. The blonde hair burned in his mind.

"Ah, yes. Class, we have three new students. Meet Richy, Clarissa, and Calavier," Heinz explained, pointing to each one as he said their name.

"Calavier," Phineas thought. He thought it sounded like "cavalier", and that is because it did.

"Guess what? I made you all name tags!" Heinz announced in a sing-song voice.

It was so quiet, they could almost hear their own heartbeat.

"Come up here, class. Man, is it just me, or are you guys zombies or something? Will you react if- Will you react if I start throwing raincoats?" Heinz wondered.

"You're not a very smart teacher, are you?" Richy responded.

"Excuse me?" Heinz challenged.

"My dad sells hearing aids at his drugstore," Richy advertised.

"I can hear just fine!" Heinz raged.

"That is a dumb response," Richy stated.

"I'm sorry, class, for the intermission. I am going to have a word with this boy in the other room," Heinz punished.

The class mumbled as Doofenshmirtz walked out of the room with Richy in front of him.

Two minutes later, they came out.

"Well, that was a productive talk," Heinz stated happily.

Everyone saw Richy's twisted grin, except for oblivious Heinz.

"Alright, class, let us get back to our genetics, shall we?" Heinz motioned.

Soon, they were beckoned to Mrs. Weaver's class.

"Alright, class. We are going to hit this hard; I want two essays out of all of you; make it snappy! One is going to be on human evolution, and the other on racial diversity! I want this to be all politically correct! If it isn't, you will pay one hundred score times over! You're all going to fail at life anyway, so make it snappy!" Mrs. Weaver yelled.

The students scrambled to write. That period was pandemonium.

Then they went on to Francis Monogram and his award-winning soothing voice. Isabella fell asleep a few times, and she wasn't alone.

Then they went to lunch. "Man, those essays were tiring," Isabella stated.

"I know, right?" Phineas agreed. "I felt like I was writing something pre-scripted, like I was writing a novel already written word for word, unaware that I was doing so. That wouldn't be plagiarism, would it?"

"I don't want to even think about Mrs. Weaver and her class," Balthazar muttered.

"Mrs. Weaver is the kind of person who isn't a mystery when it comes to the heaven or hell conundrum," Fiona claimed.

"Yeah..." Phineas responded. He was puzzled at his own lack of presence when he thought of religion.

They sat down next to Pedro, Calavier, Richy, and Baljeet.

"I have been feeling a lot better today," Baljeet exclaimed.

"Nice," Pedro deadpanned.

"No, really! I have been speaking perfectly well since this morning, except for my every other syllable accent! I can recall words like asset, aglet, quince, and- Oh my goodness! Phalanges! I can't believe I forgot phalanges!" Baljeet exclaimed. "Oh, no, but I'm using co- whatever those word shorts are. Darn it! What's that word?!"

"Contractions?" Calavier tested.

"Dah-arn it! That's what it- Oh no!" Baljeet exclaimed.

"Calm down," Phineas instructed.

While Phineas, Fiona, Balthazar, and Pedro were all distracted by Baljeet, Richy proceeded to make small talk with Isabella.

"Hey, Isabella, right?" Richy started.

"Yep," Isabella responded.

"What's your family work in?" Richy wondered.

"Well, my mom- why?" Isabella questioned.

"It's a big part of life," Richy stated.

"Well, isn't that kind of personal?" Isabella wondered slightly apprehensively.

"The amount of money you make is personal," Richy equivocated.

"Okay, my mom runs a place called Nosh Olé Mexican-Jewish Café," Isabella answered.

"Ah, yeah, business follows my family around. Want a cigarette?" Richy offered.

"What the- no! This is school!" Isabella denied in shock.

"Cafeteria lady's okay with it, see?" Richy pointed.

The cafeteria lady winked at Richy with a smile.

Isabella was flabbergasted.

"I have never had a cigarette and never will," Isabella stated.

Richy broke into laughter. "Beyuf', come over here," he called.

Buford did.

"This girl nerd here is to afwaid to try somthing new," Richy explained.

Buford burst into hard laughter.

"Girly's got the wimp gene. Girly's got the wimp gene," Buford taunted.

"That slur was most despicable," Calavier stated. No one thought he was listening.

"Despick your mom," Richy countered.

"My mother is dead, ragamuffins," Calavier stated harshly.

"Ouch, burn," Buford commented in sarcastic awe.

Richy tried to push Calavier, but he was gone like the wind; Calavier was good at slinking.

"Are you a sissy or not?" Richy asked.

Isabella flashed back to the morning.

"Isabella, remember to go out there and try new things. You never know what you'll find," her mother had reminded.

"Okay, I'll do it, but only once!" Isabella stated firmly.

She lit the cigarette and smoked for the first time.

Meanwhile, Phineas, Fiona, Balthazar, and Pedro were all talking to Baljeet.

"Yeah, I've been- oh! I just used another con- Augh!" Baljeet exclaimed.

"How did this all start?" Pedro wondered.

Baljeet just shrugged his shoulders.

"Oh, I just re- Did you know I can do this?" Baljeet wondered.

"Augh!" Phineas, Fiona, Balthazar, and Pedro all cried in unison.

"Dude, bending your elbow sideways, that is literally the grossest thing I've seen since fourth grade," Balthazar exclaimed.

"I think I'm going to hurl," a green Fiona muttered. "Balthazar! Stop patting me on the back!"

"Oh, sorry! I thought I was helping," Balthazar responded.

"And I can do this!" Baljeet explained.

"Augh! Baljeet! Make it stop!" Pedro exclaimed.

Soon, lunch ended.

Mrs. What's-Her-Face had them do even more tiring exercises, but then, after school, they boarded the bus.

"Finally! What a long day!" Fiona exclaimed.

"Yeah, totally. Thank Monogram it wasn't an utterly painful day," Phineas responded. "So, do you want to come by my house this afternoon and build it?"

"Um-" Balthazar started.

"Sure!" Fiona interjected.

"Isabella, you want to build a clock at my house this afternoon?" Phineas wondered.

"Sure," Isabella deadpanned.

Soon, they were building it.

"Wow, you really do have enormous talent, Phineas," Fiona stated.

Then they looked back to see the clock had disappeared.

"What the h***? Oh my gosh! I'm so sorry! My uncle's contagious. Argh!" Fiona grunted. She pulled out her note book and pulled off all of the sticky notes. "260 Days Since Last Profanity" became "0 Days Since Last Profanity".

"This makes no sense. How could-" Balthazar started.

"This happens all the time; don't be surprised," Phineas stated. "Tomorrow we can make that pineapple farm."

"You really want me to eat my words, don't you, Phineas?" Fiona asked with playful mischief in her voice.

"What do you mean?" Phineas wondered.

Balthazar broke into laughter. Isabella just frowned.

 **I am so sorry this took so long to write. Know the next chapter might not be for a while, because, well, it is very time-consuming. Anyway, thanks to all those who have given me responses. Please review! :-) And, um, eat a homemade honey bun or else. :-þ**


	21. The Fourth Day Of School

**Warning! This is a disclaimer for an inappropriate joke as told by a character. Reader discretion advised.**

"What? Who? Where am I?" Phineas asked.

The room was pitch black and silence taunted him.

"Dark times," a distinctive voice whispered.

"Wait! Calavier! Explain why I am here!" Phineas shouted.

"I cannot. I can only tell you that I am not the one holding you here," Calavier stated.

"Where's my family? Friends? Tell me everything!" Phineas cried.

"I can tell you nothing. I can only tell you that you will be here in the future," Calavier stated, striking fear into Phineas.

Phineas woke at once. He was frightened. He shivered under his modest covers. He squeezed his eyes shut, only to find it freaked him out more, not less.

He got up and dressed with the speed of a convict under a guillotine. He nearly ran Ferb over as he ran out of the hallway.

"Mom, I have been having bad dreams lately," Phineas confessed.

"Really? What are they about, hon?" Linda wondered. Her presence calmed him a little.

"They're about this boy from school," Phineas explained. He needed to tell someone, and he didn't think Isabella, Fiona, Candace, or Ferb would take him seriously.

"Oh! What does he do to you in your dreams?" Linda asked.

"He doesn't do anything, Mom. He is just a bystander, but he is the only thing in common," Phineas related.

"How many of these have you had?" Linda interjected.

"Two, but this kid I don't know was in both. The first one was before I ever saw his face!" Phineas exclaimed.

"And they were both terrible dreams?" Linda checked.

"Yes," Phineas confirmed. "He was just part of my first one, but in my second, he- he- it was dark, but I knew his voice."

"Maybe you should befriend this kid. He seems-" Linda started.

"No! Just, no. I- I- I just, I can't. If I befriend him, what if horrid things happen? What if Isabella dies of smoking and we all get held hostage in seperate rooms and-" Phineas ranted.

"Whoa! Whoa! Whoa! Whoa! First off, Isabella is a good girl; she would never smoke. Second, why would we all be held hostage? I mean, we are the calmest, most stable family in all of Danville! What odd miracle catastrophe could shake that? I mean, nothing big ever happens here, ever. Well, I guess there are birthday parties, and a couple odd days like when you built that swing set for Mrs. Weaver's nephews, but for the most part, your father will never stop drinking Earl Grey, there will always be an empty backyard for you to hang out in on a warm summer's day, and I'll always bake pies off and on. I think you, mister, need to be getting more sleep."

Phineas shot a look at his mother that gave her fear.

"You don't doubt what I said, right?" Linda called.

Phineas just put his hand on his cheek and got up and got ready for school.

After brushing his teeth, Phineas found himself pinching one of his pimples.

"Ew!" he exclaimed as he washed his hands twice.

That was when he scrunched up his eyes and covered them, and consequently screamed.

"Keep it down!" Candace yelled across the hall.

Phineas clamped his teeth together and stiffened. This was the last thing he needed at the start of his day.

Time trotted along, and soon, Phineas was boarding the bus.

When he got on, he noticed that no one was in their normal positions.

"I'm doin' the route backwards today, kids, for safety reasons," the bus driver announced.

Phineas found a seat next to Fiona, it being one of less than five open seats.

"Hi, Phineas, how you doing?" Fiona asked.

"Horrible. I had a bad morning," Phineas stated.

"What happened?" Fiona asked.

"Just awful nightmares, my sister yelling at me, and- Oh! I forgot to eat breakfast. Oh, well; it's only the most important meal of the day," Phineas explained.

"Ouch! Here could you take my jacket? I already have an extra backpack, and-" Fiona started.

"Ah!" Phineas exclaimed. He got up and ran towards the back, with Fiona's jacket covering the front of his face.

"Phineas, what are you doing?!" Fiona exclaimed.

Phineas jumped out the back window of the bus, and landed on a car's windshield that was right behind the bus, much to the stupefaction of his fellow students. Thankfully, he was able to jump to safety. The only problem now was that he had to walk, or run, to school. He felt the swift breeze chill his wan cheeks. He quickened his pace as he reached the intersection crosswalk. Misreading signs can be very dangerous; Phineas didn't notice the red hand in front of him. The car slammed on the brakes. Phineas screamed. It was a near miss. Soon, he reached his school, shaken up, but okay. He got there five minutes late.

"So class, this means that without the skin, we would all get eaten alive by prokaryotics if we didn't accidentally kill ourselves first," Heinz explained.

As Phineas walked to his seat, Fiona spoke.

"Thanks a lot for the extra luggage," Fiona sneered, more with frustration than disdain. "Do you know what happened to my jacket?"

Phineas took his backpack, covered his face with his hand, and sat down.

"Now, can anyone tell me what the outermost part of the skin is?" Heinz beckoned.

Baljeet raised his hand.

"The dermis?" Baljeet asked.

"No," Heinz denied.

"Ha! Nerd doesn't even get it right!" Buford muttered.

Phineas raised his hand.

"The subdermis?" Phineas guessed.

Heinz chuckled heartily.

"Close," he admitted.

Balthazar raised his hand.

"The upper dermis?" Balthazar guessed.

"Well, I guess, but that isn't what it's called. Anyone else?" Heinz beckoned.

Calavier raised his hand.

"That would be the epidermis," Calavier stated.

"Yes! The epidermis!" Heinz exclaimed.

"Is that the part you rub off in the shower?" Buford asked.

"Ew!" several people, including Fiona, interjected.

"I round it up into little balls," Irving stated.

"Ew!" the entire class exclaimed, except for Buford, Froyo, and choice others.

"Calm down. Calm down," Heinz instructed.

"I stick mine in my bellybutton," Richy joked.

"Gross! What kind of sick kids are in this class?" Heinz exclaimed.

"Relax, I'm joking," Richy stated. "You don't want to know what I do with my epidermis."

Many gasped.

Heinz's face hardened.

He grabbed Richy and took him out of the classroom.

Heinz returned to the classroom without Richy.

"So, class?" Heinz greeted. "Let's move onto the dermis."

· · ·

Phineas walked through the threshold. Mrs. Weaver's class was just great.

"Alright, class, take a seat! Complete as many writing exercises as you can! I want at least 20 done by the end of this class. Time is wasting!" Mrs. Weaver bellowed.

Phineas wanted to cry.

· · ·

Phineas sat down.

"All right, class, today, let's start out with a poem I wrote this morning," Monogram greeted.

Isabella was already nodding off before he reached the first stanza.

"Grace In Dawn, by Francis Monogram," Monogram started. "The bees, they fly, the trees, they sigh, the melodies pour out of fountains. The fleas will die, the sees and sights, the harmonies flow down from mountains. The doe is fed, the doves are wed, the glories we are still counting. The-"

Meanwhile, Phineas was drifting asleep.

"AUGH! My back! Ow, oh!" Francis cried.

This gave Phineas such a start, he almost screamed.

The other students were startled too, their stupors popping like oversized bubbles.

"Oh, I think I'm okay," a breathless Francis peeped.

Phineas moaned through a shiver as he tried to get back to calm.

Monogram returned to his tranquil rhythm.

"The farmer said, 'The weeds are dead!' The harvest, oh, what a bounty!" Monogram continued. "AUGH! My spine! Oahh..."

This riled Phineas even more; he was now visibly shaking.

This made all of the students tense up even more than they had before.

"Somebody call 911!" Monogram cried.

They did.

Soon, the paramedics came.

"What's going on?!" the principal interrogated upon entry to the room.

"Mr. Monogram hurt his back!" Pedro informed.

"Francis?" the principal called. "Are you okay?"

"Read them the rest of my poem for me!" Monogram cried as they took him away.

Buford went up to Mr. Monogram's desk, took the piece of paper the poem was written on, crumpled it into a little ball, and swallowed it.

"Buford!" the class exclaimed.

"What? Mr. Monogram's paper tastes the best!" Buford responded.

Fiona shook her head in disbelief.

"Alright, kids. It's lunch time!" the principal announced.

"What a bounty it is," Buford stated.

· · ·

Phineas and Isabella sat at the table, while the others went to get pizza, which was by far the most popular cafeteria lunch.

"So, how was your day?" Phineas wondered.

"Good. And yours?" Isabella asked.

"Horrible. I had a bad dream, a frustrating encounter with my mother, acne dealings, my sister yelled at me, missed breakfast, Fiona's probably mad at me because I lost her jacket, and did I mention I fell out of the bus? Nearly got hit by a car, gross-out in science, oppression in english, jump scares in history, where does it end?" Phineas moped.

"The buck doesn't stop at Mrs. What's-Her-Face," Isabella stated.

Fiona was just walking in.

"Augh, do have to do P. E. today, too?" Phineas muttered.

"I'm afraid so. Do you guys know what happened to my jacket? I have been carrying around so much stuff today, I had to get a cafeteria lunch," Fiona explained.

Phineas put his hand over his face and Isabella blushed.

"No," Isabella responded. Was that a lie? It depends. Was it dishonest? Yes.

You know what happened to it, Phineas?" Fiona wondered.

Phineas shook his head, guilt inside him, ready to pop.

"Balth, have you seen my jacket?" Fiona asked.

And so Phineas and Isabella began to talk again.

"Man, I have a litte craving," Isabella admitted.

"Craving for what?" Phineas wondered. He was cut off by someone yelling at the top of their lungs.

"You!" he cried. Then the boy threw his luncheon at the other boy, who happened to be Monty.

"What? I just got this shirt last weekend. You are so dead!" Monty grunted.

Monty threw his apple at the boy, but it went over his head and hit Buford smack dab in his sutures.

"Hey! What's the big idea! Which one of you jerks hit me in the head with an apple?" Buford bellowed. "You! You! You! Ohh, you!" Buford chucked the apple at Cecil, and it ricocheted off and went straight toward Vanessa. Ferb caught it with his right hand, aimed, and knocked Buford out with it at fifteen feet. The apple fell apart, shooting in all directions.

At this point, pandemonium ensued.

People started throwing food, knocking over tables, and beating each other up.

Fiona got a banana peel around her neck, Isabella got cheese on her foot, and Phineas got a full, bountiful key lime pie in the face.

"Whoa! Whoa! Whoa!" the cafateria lady shouted.

Not one offender ceased in their throwing of food.

"Stop!" she shouted through her megaphone.

Balthazar got hit in the tibia with a backpack.

By this time, many of the kids were under tables.

The chaos intensified; tables were overturned, chairs were thrown, and metal water bottles were flung.

While Phineas was getting the pie off of his face and Isabella was scraping the cheese off of her foot, Fiona went out and started cleaning up the thrown food.

Then some kid came up and started throwing full metal water bottles at Isabella's posterior.

"Ow! Ow!" Isabella exclaimed.

Phineas immediately came up to the kid, but the kid just swung his textbook at Phineas' head, and, seeing Phineas fall, reverted his focus to throwing things at someone else.

"Phineas! Oh my gosh- is that a black eye?" Isabella gasped.

Phineas just moaned in a tone of pure misery, frustration, and exhaustion.

She kissed him on the cheek and helped him up. They were on the far outskirts of the battle zone, so they weren't being assaulted.

Before long, a bunch of the staff came in, and they were all very angry that they had to leave their lunch. The kids got under control real fast.

This was really a horrible experience: The first major food fight of the year.

It seeme to take forever for everyone to get out of the cafeteria; first there was a major cleanup, and then they still had to wait longer to leave.

Eventually, they got to their physical education.

Mrs. What's-Her-Face said that they had special plans for that day.

"Alright, I'll pick three names from this jar, and whoever I pick will get the biggest workout of their life," Mrs. What's-Her-Face explained. "Let's see, first, Ferb Fletcher."

Ferb just smiled. He wasn't afraid of exerting himself.

"Shouldn't we all do the same thing?" Calavier questioned.

"No!" Mrs. What's-Her-Face stifled.

"We also have Buford Van Stomm," Mrs. What's-Her-Face informed.

These were two of the toughest kids in the class.

"And the last one is, oh! Phineas Flynn," Mrs. What's-Her-Face finished.

Phineas' jaw dropped. After all he had been through that day, he got this. He wanted to go to sleep, not just because he was tired, but because he wanted this streak to end. Of course, now was definitely not the time for that.

"Alright, we are going to start with planks. Two minutes, go!" Mrs. What's-Her-Face beckoned. "Now class, you can make it more challenging. Distract them!"

A couple kids just idled, but the rest of the class went all around Phineas and started yelling.

Phineas wasn't sure he could hold out from the beginning, but he was on the edge of collapse now. The sudden pain was intense; he never felt such a drastic increase in pain.

"Fall!" Froyo screamed.

"You can't do it! Look at those flimsy muscles," another student reasoned.

Phineas' abdominals were crying out louder and louder.

"Just tip over already!" a voice yelled.

Phineas' stress levels were skyrocketing.

His collapse was undeniable; one moment later, he collapsed.

He hurt everywhere, but nowhere more than his prefrontal cortex.

Some of the kids laughed and jeered at Phineas.

"Get up! More planks now!" Mrs. What's-Her-Face shouted.

Phineas moaned.

"No kinetic? Your grade doesn't look too good right now," Mrs. What's-Her-Face threatened.

"No," Phineas managed to squeak.

"Excuse me?" Mrs. What's-Her-Face challenged.

"I said, no," Phineas stated. "I am going to do what is best for my body."

Mrs. What's-Her-Face recoiled in surprise. "This is P.E., not yoga, runt!"

"Physical education should not contain overexertion to the point of bodily harm," Calavier countered.

"He's just a sissy," Mrs. What's-Her-Face insulted.

There was an eruption of laughter.

Phineas anger flared up.

"I have had enough of you slobs! I am taking a bathroom break," Phineas stated in stone-cold voice.

"No bathroom breaks during class!" Mrs. What's-Her-Face stopped.

At least half of the class knew that was not the right response. She shouldn't have tried to stifle him; he was just trying to get out of his anger. She was blocking his path to calming down.

"Well, I have to go! My bladder doesn't listen to other people's chidings," Phineas stated. Then he left.

"Excuse-" Mrs. What's-Her-Face started, but he was already gone. "Man, that kid! Rgh! Wait 'til he sees his referral."

Meanwhile, Phineas went to the bathroom. "Oh, come on!" he yelled as he realized the toilet seat broke.

Phineas went to another stall and sat on the toilet seat.

Taking deep breaths, he cleared his head.

"This is just today," he told himself. "I can deal with one bad day, right?"

He sent up a silent prayer without giving it much thought. He still had no strong religious opinion.

Then, as he relieved himself, he thought about his life ahead of him, something he never used to do. His whole childhood passed without a word, and that was his fault. He eventually felt much better now that he was relieved of his duty. He washed his hands and went back.

"Mr. Flynn, here is your referral. Go to the office," Mrs. What's-Her-Face ordered.

Phineas frowned a heavy arch and left.

He went over to the office.

He opened the door and handed the referral to the principal.

"So, you disrupted class. What happened?" the principal questioned.

"I went to the bathroom, because I absolutely had to," Phineas stated.

"And?" the principal interrogated.

"She got mad at me because I couldn't complete the exercise," Phineas explained.

"Baloney! You know what? You, son, are getting detention," the principal condemned.

 **This was a very bad day for Phineas. Don't worry, this is just one, little day. We all have those awful days. At least Richy wasn't there the whole time. XD**


	22. Vanessa's Fourth Day Of School

Vanessa woke up. It was Thursday, the fourth day of school. She yawned.

"Good morning, sweetie," Heinz greeted. "Want a muffin?"

"Sure," Vanessa muttered. She was barely awake.

She took a bite, and was surprised.

"Dad, these muffins are spicy! What did you mess up this time?!" Vanessa exclaimed.

"I put a habañero pepper in the mix. I have got a cra-a-ave for spicy today!" Heinz exclaimed.

"It was intentional?! Augh, dad!" Vanessa complained.

"Now, now, honey. I read on the internet that spicy stuff makes you more manly, and the internet is always right!" Heinz explained.

"First off, that isn't true, and secondly, WHY, might I ask, do you want to turn me into a man?" Vanessa questioned.

"Because as a man- wait, you're my daughter; what am I doing?!" Heinz cried. "Oh, no! You're going to turn into a man!"

"Relax, Dad. Habañeros don't turn women into men, unless ... you drugged it. Wait, did you?!" Vanessa yelled.

"No! No, I just bought it at the local supermarket and put it in my large muffin batch," Heinz explained.

"Then I am not going to freakishly turn into a man and we can get on with our day!" Vanessa bellowed.

Then her phone buzzed.

"Ooh! A text!" Vanessa squealed.

"Wait, who are you texting?" Heinz asked.

"Who texted me? It could be anyone. Now, shoo, Dad!" Vanessa dismissed.

"But honey-" Heinz started.

"Give me privacy!" Vanessa shouted.

"Yes, hon," Heinz groaned.

She looked and saw a text from Ferb.

"Good morning!" Ferb texted.

"To you too! What's new?" Vanessa asked.

"I just broke my electric toothbrush head, like, five minutes ago. And we are out. :- " Ferb explained.

"What does :- mean?" Vanessa wondered.

"It means you can't see below my nose," Ferb clarified.

"Why?" Vanessa continued.

"Because there isn't any mouth," Ferb defined.

"No! Noy that! I'n talkimg about what expression does itt conbey?" Vanessa explained haphazardly.

"Oh, that's funny!" Ferb stated.

"Why?" Vanessa asked.

"Oh ... oops... Never mind, it would be the nose anyway" Ferb texted rapidly.

"I am so confused. :- " Vanessa stated.

"Why?" Ferb asked.

"I don't know. I don't know why my dad didn't buy any lunch meat. I don't know why he put a habañero in the muffins." Vanessa texted.

"Habañero in a muffin? Isn't that a felony?" Ferb asked.

"Not in this state" Vanessa responded.

"It has to be at least a misdemeanor." Ferb concluded.

"They don't have THAT many laws" Vanessa texted. "Anyway, I need to get ready. See you at lunch."

"K" Ferb texted back.

Vanessa chuckled and put away her phone.

· · ·

Vanessa got out of the car.

She was rushed off to her physical education class.

They were running three miles, and at the end, she was horribly tired.

Gasping after finishing her second water bottle, she was still recuperating when they moved on to Mr. Monogram's class.

He read them his poem and had them do a "poetic exercise" focusing on an ancient battle of the student's choice.

Vanessa's poem was what Monogram would consider a "moderately untuned piece of free verse". She just wanted to get through the day. She fell asleep halfway through class.

Mrs. Weaver unveiled a giant project she was going to make them do; they were supposed to write a novella by the Friday after next, which gave them eight days.

Vanessa was pretty sure she flunked her start, but at least she was feeling better.

Then it was lunch time.

Vanessa was a little slower at getting there than the rest of her class.

"Hey, guys," Vanessa greeted.

"My little brother had a birthday party. Bla, bla, bla. So then my dad found a pipe on the ground, and he started mutilating the piñata! But what he didn't know was that it was filled with flour, not candy!" Cecil exclaimed.

"Flour! Dude, that's almost as brutal as purple glitter!" Danny responded.

"He- he- he looked like a zombie that someone was about to cook up!" Cecil managed to say through his laughter. "Then my oblivious mother put a blindfold on the Chinese kid, and five minutes later, my father looked like a real zombie! He even had the groan going! I have the pictures posted on my Facebook page!"

Vanessa pulled out her phone.

"Ha! Ha! He looks like Einstein as an undead carcass!" she responded.

"Ouch," Ferb interjected, as he saw and perceived. "That looks-"

He was cut off by someone yelling at the top of their lungs.

"You!" he cried. Then the boy threw his luncheon at the other boy, who happened to be Monty.

"What? I just got this shirt last weekend. You are so dead!" Monty grunted.

Monty threw his apple at the boy, but it went over his head and hit Buford smack dab in his sutures.

"Hey! What's the big idea! Which one of you jerks hit me in the head with an apple?" Buford bellowed. "You! You! You! Ohh, you!" Buford chucked the apple at Cecil, and it ricocheted off and went straight toward Vanessa. Ferb caught it with his right hand, aimed, and knocked Buford out with it at fifteen feet. The apple split apart, shooting in all directions.

Vanessa gasped.

At this point, pandemonium ensued.

People started throwing food, knocking over tables, and beating each other up. But as far as Ferb, no one wanted to lay a hand on him, because of his otherworldly throw. Vanessa's proximity to Ferb was small enough for her to be out of the war zone.

"Whoa! Whoa! Whoa!" the cafateria lady shouted.

Not one offender ceased in their throwing of food.

"Stop!" she shouted through her megaphone.

"Maybe we should get out of here," Ferb suggested. "I am not in the mood for a food fight."

"Way ahead of you, Ferb," Vanessa responded. They got up and proceeded.

By this time, many of the kids were under tables.

The chaos intensified; tables were overturned, chairs were thrown, and metal water bottles were flung.

"How did you manage to start a food fight with one single throw of an apple?" Vanessa asked Ferb.

"Well, I am a little controversial," Ferb stated.

"Apparently," Vanessa responded. "Yeah, what did you do to...?"

Ferb shrugged.

Vanessa tilted her head.

She then continued to eat her lunch.

 **· · ·**

"And, Vanessa, when you pour the liquid in, seal it immediately, or some of the gas might escape," Heinz stated.

"Da- Dr. Doofenshmirtz!" Vanessa shouted. "Isn't this a little dangerous?"

"Only if you don't seal it fast," Heinz responded.

"Mixing ammonia and bleach is always a bad idea," Vanessa stated. "Fine!"

She poured the bleach in and immediately sealed the small open part of the bag.

"Yay, now we have toxic gas in a bag," Cecil observed.

"Yes, class, and if anyone tries to pop this, you are going to die," Heinz stated.

The boys didn't look very happy with what Heinz just said.

"In fact, I am putting it in a safe. That way, we can expirement tomorrow with it and insects," Heinz stated. "Oop, this class is just about over. Get ready to leave."

 **There we go. The end of my school year was very hectic. I am happy to publish a chapter again. Sorry it has taken so long! I am planning for one more calm chapter and then, well, muwahaha! .\/. Review!**


	23. The Fifth Day Of School

"What? Why are there weapons everywhere?" Phineas cried.

"They're prepping," Calavier stated. "Prepping for war."

"What do they want?!" Phineas continued.

"World domination."

"Who are they?"

"You'll find out."

"Why won't you tell me?!"

Calavier clapped twice.

"Calavier, why?" Phineas moaned.

Calavier frowned, cleared his throat, and looked up.

Then he was gone.

Phineas woke. He was very sweaty. His mom had gone a little overboard with the covers last night.

He began to get ready for school.

He went through the routine, with a racing mind, and he felt like was losing.

He got on the bus and sat down.

"Good morning!" Fiona greeted. "I still can't find my jacket. I guess I shouldn't even be asking you, since I asked yesterday-"

"I'm sorry. It was in my face when I fell out of the bus yesterday. I'm also sorry I didn't tell you then and there."

"Really? Really?! Augh! My mom is going to make me pay in cash for it, you know," Fiona stated.

"I'm sorry, okay? I just- I had a horrible day yesterday. You understand why I didn't tell you right then, right?"

"Honesty is prompt."

"Yesterday was crafted in the image of hell."

Fiona was clearly angry. She stared at him.

Phineas cowered back.

"I took care of all of the stuff you left me with. You had one thing! And you left it somewhere, probably in the middle of the road. There's probably a family of opossums in it now, and it is probably totally ruined by the grime of tires. What do you have to say?!"

"I had a horrible nightmare about darkness?"

The bus stopped.

They were at school.

They headed off to their class promptly.

"Good morning, class!" Heinz greeted. "We looked at the integumentary system yesteraday. Today, we are going to be looking at the skeletal system. This lesson might be a little tedious, it is very challenging. I'll give you fifteen seconds to look at a fully mapped out skeleton diagram, and then you, as a class, will use these fake bones to reconstruct the entire skeleton, and I want you to put the correct labels in the proper places! Yes, Calavier?"

"Why are there two skulls?"

"That... was a mistake. Mrs. Nasopharynx must be really mad right now. Who would want to reconstruct a headless skeleton?"

"Ooh! We could make Siamese twins, just like my cousins!" Pedro exclaimed.

"Knock yourself out, kid," Heinz deadpanned.

"They'll have a good head on each shoulder," Pedro continued.

"Put his heads on his butt!" Richy suggested. "Suture buns!"

"Okay, okay, no mutations, I want your standard, run-of-the-mill skeleton construction. No extra heads!"

"Then what do we do with the other head?"

"Absolutely nothing," Heinz answered.

He looked to his right to see that a third of the class was looking at the diagram already.

"No! Augh, this day has just gone perfectly. Okay, tell me if the radius and the ulna had a baby, what would it be?"

"Subcu-spaceous gland?" Buford guessed.

"That is part of the integumentary system, Buford," Heinz stated. "And it is the subcutaneous gland."

Buford growled. He didn't want to be at school.

"The humerus! Get it? The humerus? Why aren't you laughing? Don't get my... humor! It is... humorous, right? Get it now? Get it now?" Heinz ranted.

You could have heard crickets if there were any.

"Build it!" Heinz instructed. "I'll give you homework at the end of class. Now I wonder where this skull goes."

"The butt," Richy poked.

"Actually, this one goes on the counter, since we are not using this one," Heinz countered.

"So the other one goes on the butt. Wow, one lonely bun, that is so sad."

"Enough butt talk! The head goes on the anterior, not the posterior!"

"Your posterior!" Richy quipped. "Hey! I didn't say butt!"

"Save it for the digestive system, Richy! Anyway-"

"Done!" the class exclaimed.

"Oh! Whoa, that was fast. And, you have all the bones wrong, backwards, and upside down. Who has hands for feet accompanied by vice versa?" Heinz asked.

"Agh!" Baljeet exclaimed as he stammered with his hands, trying to move the labels around.

"Fingers are not called lumbar vertebrae! Nor is a toe a pelvis! You have the upper arms where the lower legs should be, you have the lower arms where the upper legs should be, and vice versa twice respectively. Your pelvis bones have the posterior anterior and vice versa- How many times will I have to say vice versa? Okay, let's work on this together."

A loud crack flew into the ears of those in the room.

"Richy! Did you bave to break one of the bones?!"

"It was just the extra skull-" Richy started.

"Extra? That was the one we were going to use! Now we are going to have to use the other skull! Agh! These belong to Mrs. Nasopharynx! What will I tell her? What? Oh, no! These are not from her body, they are fake, see?" Heinz responded.

"Prove it!" Richy challenged.

"There were two nearly identical heads, and they are whiter than falling snow on a pallid face of the moon! Okay, that was a bad example, but you get my drift. Also, there is no spongy bone on the inside of this broken fake skull."

Richy didn't look happy.

"Now quit interrupting Richy, or remember what happened when we studied the integumentary system? You don't want that." Doofenshmirtz paused for an extra jiffy. "Now, class, let's work on this together."

The fire alarm sounded.

Doofenshmirtz beckoned to them hastily and his class followed him out the door.

"No talking!" he snapped.

They went outside and stood in a line.

There was a small breeze and no clouds.

It was nothing but blue and a large jet thousands of feet in the air, looking like a bug.

The sun beat down as the other classes came.

Time passed. They were getting baked.

Finally, after quite a few minutes, they went to lunch.

"That was crazy, wasn't it?" Phineas asked.

"Well, we skipped two classes, so good fire drill!" Isabella responded.

"Are you sure it was just a drill?"

"Not completely."

"Hmm, maybe Fiona would know."

"I've got the urge."

"Urge for what?"

Isabella walked away.

Phineas was pretty sure this was the textbook definition of suspicious.

"Oh. Hi, Fiona!" Phineas greeted.

"Good afternoon," Fiona responded.

"That sounded forced."

"I'm okay, just not great."

"Why?"

"You don't really talk about it."

"Oh, sorry. I'm just curious."

"Don't be."

"Wait, what the frump!"

Smoke rose and Isabella took the cigarette and put it back in her mouth.

"Phineas?" Fiona called.

She got no response.

He looked more wan than a snowball on a black car.

"I think I'm gonna sit now," he muttered.

"Phineas?" Fiona repeated.

"This is very bad." Phineas found his eyes resting on Calavier, who was a good distance away.

Fiona could sense his anger rise.

He had turned from pale to florid to red.

The more Phineas thought about Isabella's condition in his dream, the more infuriated he got.

He got up like a robot.

Balthazar cringed as Phineas swept past him.

"Isabella!" he bellowed.

Three eighths of the kids in the cafeteria completely stopped.

He was loud.

Isabella was immediately alarmed. She decided she needed to go to the bathroom anyway at that moment.

Phineas was even more shocked than he was infuriated.

It was all going to come true, and he expected more dreams.

 **I have finally updated! You'd figure writing would be easier in the summertime. But that's not so. :-\**


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